That's a Gift

My husband and I went to a memorial service this evening for the mother of one of the best friends of my life.   She and I have been close from the point we met in elementary school.  We spent many afternoons at each other's houses after school and I have lots of fond memories of her mother starting from when we were young children, to a Christmas party we saw her at just last year.  

The service was lovely, poignant and yet a happy memory of a life well-lived.   We met with their family afterwards and reminisced with some friends we hadn't seen in a long time.

My friend had done a lot of work to get everything coordinated for the memorial service.   I suppose I hadn't thought about what would need to be done when a parent dies before.   There was so much to be done.    One of the first things was writing the obituary.   How do you summarize a life?   What do you leave out?  How do you capture the essence of a person in a few words?   I don't know, but my mother does.

My mother is an organized person who plans ahead.   My mother has written both her and my father's obituaries in advance, in the case something were to happen to either of them.   My mother has given me copies of these obituaries for future need.     I dutifully filed them with the other important documents of theirs she had shared and thought not much more about them.

When my friend's mother died, she and I talked on the phone.   She was struggling because she didn't know what to put in her mother's obituary.   I told her I could share my parent's if that would give her some guidance and she said that would be helpful.    She told me later how helpful they had been in giving her some direction.   She also told me it was a lot of work to figure out everything her mother had done and get it all summarized.

I happened to be having this conversation in our kitchen at movie night when a friend of ours was listening in.   When he realized my mother had written their obituaries already he turned to me and said, "that's a gift."   I agreed with him completely, it is a tremendous gift.    It is a gift I didn't even begin to appreciate until just recently.

The Big Boy Update:  My son isn't allowed to take toys into school.   The other morning he had something he really wanted to show to his friends, so he asked me,  "could you take a picture of my spy gear so I can show it to my friends?"  I told him I would.   I'm not sure how the picture was going to make it to class, but it was the idea of taking a picture of the item when the item itself wasn't allowed, that impressed me.

The Tiny Girl Chronicles:  "Where is Gramp's bear?"   My father got my daughter the smallest little purple stuffed bear I've ever seen something like a year ago.   It's about two inches tall and it's arms and legs move and my daughter loves it.   It gets lost and found over time, mostly lost knowing how my children move toys around.   Last night she wanted Gramp's bear to go to bed.   Fortunately, I had seen it only minutes before.   It's too small to hug, but I think she tried.

Fitness Update:  Five miles and I want to take this opportunity to say I think my neighbor is either testing me or trying to kill me by wanting to run earlier and earlier.