I was riding in the car this morning with my daughter to the next city over for an appointment for her Urology PT (yes, there is such a thing) and we got to talking about beling blind. This rarely happens where my daughter is interested in discussing anything about her, which has caused me to learn to approach things from a tangent. If I can get her talking about one thing, she may well open up and let me into her world of blindness. Approached directly, she just shuts down.
This morning I told her about a YouTube channel I watched that was a man who was blind from birth. He is charismatic and a happy guy and enjoyable to listen to. In this particular hour-long video he went through questions from the comments in his social media accounts. I thought my daughter might be interested in both the questions and his answer.
One of them was about "watching" YouTube videos, television shows, and films—how could he do so without sight? He talked about not necessarily needing to see to understand most things and talked about using descriptive audio and how it was a good thing and helpful for things that weren't as much dialog-based. My daughter said, "I watch shows too, just like me!" She felt less alone I got the sense, knowing that someone else watched things like she did.
Next, I told her about how he commonly, frequently even, had people try and help him across streets. He's had people stop and get out of their cars to help him cross a street he crosses on a regular basis with no assistance. He is always grateful for the help and typically doesn't even let them know the help was unneeded.
My daughter asked about his cane or if he had a dog and I admitted I wasn't sure. He mentioned his cane several times but never talked about a dog. My daughter confirmed something I've been assuming for some time now when she said, "I'll have a dog. I want a dog." We talked about how they were expensive to train but that when the time came when she was older, we would certainly look into it more if she still felt strongly about having a sighted guide dog.
Then I told her about the question he got asked all the time. He was born completely blind but people want to know if he could be sighted, would he want to? He said he's gone back and forth one. He sometimes says yes, but he doesn't see the need for sight since he knows how to do everything blind. He's been in radio for over thirty years and is completely self-sufficient. Sometimes though, he thinks it would be interesting to see what this seeing thing is all about. My daughter said, "I'd rather be blind too." I was surprised to hear her say this, especially since she used to be able to see. She added a second later, "well, with a little bit of vision." I think the last bit of residual vision she has is useful to her and she doesn't want to lose it.
I told her if she wanted to listen to the interview with me, I'd be glad to play it for her. She is interested. I think she'd like hearing about another blind person and how they live. Especially someone who is so positive about their blindness and a life lived being blind.
The Big Boy Update: My son loves messing with his sister when she's sleeping. I don't know what it is, he's not being malicious, he's just interested in her and I think wants to know what it takes to wake her up. He's done this multiple times in the past weeks since she's had her shifted sleep schedule and has been falling asleep early in the main areas of the house. She dislikes being messed with (having blankets put on her, removed, arms repositioned, face touched, etc.). My son got a consequence for it today.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: One thing I mentioned that Tommy Edison (the blind man who's channel I've been watching) said one thing he couldn't understand is how we sighted people keep our eyes open all day. He said it must be exhausting. He has his eyes closed almost all the time. He can keep them open for about a minute before his eyelids get too tired. My daughter thought this was really interesting and said she keeps her eyes closed some of the time too.
Tuesday, December 31, 2019
Monday, December 30, 2019
No Dinner
We had a situation today. It is complicated but it ended with my daughter getting sent to her room without dinner, told she had to write eight apology notes and the loss of trampoline privileges for four days. It wasn't good.
There are sometimes eight children in line to get on the trampoline. They've come up with games and are pretty good at following the rules, which I have laminated on a printed sheet pinned to the side beside the steps to get in. I'll tell the story from two sides because I think my daughter's side is important to tell and I learned more about it afterward.
I was called out by the children and a phone call from one of the parents because they had a situation they wanted to talk about. My daughter had come inside, crying, saying she didn't want to talk to Mr. Benji because he punched people in the face. I had to almost drag her outside and my assurances Benji was not going to punch her or anyone in the face helped not one bit to calm her down.
On our porch, she lay on the sofa and the adults asked to have the story told. What the other children explained was that my son was hitting my daughter. There was some squabble about her wanting a turn and it not being her turn. She, in turn, hit her brother back. Claire asked her to stop hitting my son, to which my daughter decided to punch Jay, Claire's brother, instead. My daughter then called Claire stupid, an idiot and said she was dumb. I don't know what happened next but it ended with my daughter inside and the fathers over for a discussion of what had happened.
I explained those insults were punishable words in our house. My daughter said everyone was lying. She was hysterical at that point and screamed, multiple times, at the top of her lungs, she was so furious. She yelled and said she hated Claire. She hated Walter (the other father over), Jay and her brother. She also said she hated Mr. Benji and that he was mean and punched people in the face.
Claire, who is in either fifth or sixth grade, started crying and held on to her father. Benji told her it was okay, that he wasn't upset. Claire said she was upset though that my daughter was saying terrible things about her father. Walter told my daughter that everyone was hurt by what she was saying. There is more, but that's the general gist.
At that point, I took my daughter by the hand, said I would deal with it, apologized to everyone and pulled her inside. I was furious myself at this point and I spanked her once. I couldn't understand how she could have systematically alienated every friend she had in the group, insulted the fathers and made me feel like we were abysmal at parenting, letting our children think physical violence and insults were allowed.
I took her upstairs and told her she was confined in her room until morning with no dinner. Also, she had lost trampoline privileges for three days. I went into her room and tried to talk to her. I wanted to hear her side. She was under the bed, rolling around and crying, yelling, telling me she hated me, that she hated Claire because she was mean to her and that (this was a general theme) Mr. Benji punched people in the face.
After talking to her for a bit I got more information out of her. It appears she thought they were picking on her because she was blind. They kept saying, "we have to follow the rules that are on the paper" meaning the paper I'd attached to the side of the trampoline. My daughter knows the rules because I'd read them to her, but somehow it was conveyed, it made her feel like she was being teased since she couldn't see.
In a way, maybe they were treating her differently. My daughter also may have had expectations about when her turn was that was unfair. She can't see who gets on and off the trampoline. She may have been feeling like she was being skipped over, even though she wasn't. I talked to her about how everyone was trying to make it fair because everyone wanted their own turn.
I told her, in my anger and honestly embarrassment, that she would be writing an apology letter to everyone she'd insulted or called names. I brought her braillewriter in with some paper. The rest of the day hasn't gone that well for her. I went upstairs a few times, trying to spend time with her, but she told me she hated me and if the police were here and knew I wasn't letting her have dinner, they would kill me. She has some very, very angry thoughts right now.
I sent some messages to the two fathers explaining that she might have been triggered because she thought she was being teased. I told them she said, "I could tell they were smiling from the sounds of their faces" (meaning they were laughing at her). They were understanding and we all agreed we would continue to try and facilitate good cooperation and using appropriate words—that our children were all old enough to do so. I told them my daughter would not be using the trampoline for the next few days but that their children were welcomed to come and use it.
My daughter may be asleep now. She was bored a bit ago and I helped her find something to do from the toys in their closet. My husband and I talked about the overall situation. He said she doesn't get a lot of consequences like this and it could be a good thing. It makes me so sad that she's that fragile and would think she was being teased. She was so hateful today. Something much deeper was happening than not getting a turn on the trampoline.
The Big Boy Update: My son lost trampoline privileges for a day for hitting his sister as well.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: I heard my daughter typing on her braillewriter after being sent to her room. When I came up later she told me she'd written some notes, but that I wouldn't like them because they weren't apologizing, they were saying how she felt. I think she's very, very angry. This is what she wrote:
There are sometimes eight children in line to get on the trampoline. They've come up with games and are pretty good at following the rules, which I have laminated on a printed sheet pinned to the side beside the steps to get in. I'll tell the story from two sides because I think my daughter's side is important to tell and I learned more about it afterward.
I was called out by the children and a phone call from one of the parents because they had a situation they wanted to talk about. My daughter had come inside, crying, saying she didn't want to talk to Mr. Benji because he punched people in the face. I had to almost drag her outside and my assurances Benji was not going to punch her or anyone in the face helped not one bit to calm her down.
On our porch, she lay on the sofa and the adults asked to have the story told. What the other children explained was that my son was hitting my daughter. There was some squabble about her wanting a turn and it not being her turn. She, in turn, hit her brother back. Claire asked her to stop hitting my son, to which my daughter decided to punch Jay, Claire's brother, instead. My daughter then called Claire stupid, an idiot and said she was dumb. I don't know what happened next but it ended with my daughter inside and the fathers over for a discussion of what had happened.
I explained those insults were punishable words in our house. My daughter said everyone was lying. She was hysterical at that point and screamed, multiple times, at the top of her lungs, she was so furious. She yelled and said she hated Claire. She hated Walter (the other father over), Jay and her brother. She also said she hated Mr. Benji and that he was mean and punched people in the face.
Claire, who is in either fifth or sixth grade, started crying and held on to her father. Benji told her it was okay, that he wasn't upset. Claire said she was upset though that my daughter was saying terrible things about her father. Walter told my daughter that everyone was hurt by what she was saying. There is more, but that's the general gist.
At that point, I took my daughter by the hand, said I would deal with it, apologized to everyone and pulled her inside. I was furious myself at this point and I spanked her once. I couldn't understand how she could have systematically alienated every friend she had in the group, insulted the fathers and made me feel like we were abysmal at parenting, letting our children think physical violence and insults were allowed.
I took her upstairs and told her she was confined in her room until morning with no dinner. Also, she had lost trampoline privileges for three days. I went into her room and tried to talk to her. I wanted to hear her side. She was under the bed, rolling around and crying, yelling, telling me she hated me, that she hated Claire because she was mean to her and that (this was a general theme) Mr. Benji punched people in the face.
After talking to her for a bit I got more information out of her. It appears she thought they were picking on her because she was blind. They kept saying, "we have to follow the rules that are on the paper" meaning the paper I'd attached to the side of the trampoline. My daughter knows the rules because I'd read them to her, but somehow it was conveyed, it made her feel like she was being teased since she couldn't see.
In a way, maybe they were treating her differently. My daughter also may have had expectations about when her turn was that was unfair. She can't see who gets on and off the trampoline. She may have been feeling like she was being skipped over, even though she wasn't. I talked to her about how everyone was trying to make it fair because everyone wanted their own turn.
I told her, in my anger and honestly embarrassment, that she would be writing an apology letter to everyone she'd insulted or called names. I brought her braillewriter in with some paper. The rest of the day hasn't gone that well for her. I went upstairs a few times, trying to spend time with her, but she told me she hated me and if the police were here and knew I wasn't letting her have dinner, they would kill me. She has some very, very angry thoughts right now.
I sent some messages to the two fathers explaining that she might have been triggered because she thought she was being teased. I told them she said, "I could tell they were smiling from the sounds of their faces" (meaning they were laughing at her). They were understanding and we all agreed we would continue to try and facilitate good cooperation and using appropriate words—that our children were all old enough to do so. I told them my daughter would not be using the trampoline for the next few days but that their children were welcomed to come and use it.
My daughter may be asleep now. She was bored a bit ago and I helped her find something to do from the toys in their closet. My husband and I talked about the overall situation. He said she doesn't get a lot of consequences like this and it could be a good thing. It makes me so sad that she's that fragile and would think she was being teased. She was so hateful today. Something much deeper was happening than not getting a turn on the trampoline.
The Big Boy Update: My son lost trampoline privileges for a day for hitting his sister as well.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: I heard my daughter typing on her braillewriter after being sent to her room. When I came up later she told me she'd written some notes, but that I wouldn't like them because they weren't apologizing, they were saying how she felt. I think she's very, very angry. This is what she wrote:
Sunday, December 29, 2019
Christmas Contained
It's late. I'm tired. But Christmas has been contained. All the parts of Christmas that I'm responsible for (interior decorations for the most part with a smattering of outdoor items) have been boxed and moved upstairs into a holding area where the steps to the attic are. I thought this would be quick, but it was not...at all.
There were a lot of interruptions—a LOT of interruptions. This trampoline is a great entertainer for the children. It's also a children's magnet. We have had happy children over at our house all day. The children made up games, had conflicts, came to me to mediate, or just resorted to violence or throwing your friend's shoe in the prickly bushes.
But I got the Christmas upstairs. I got all the presents, candy, stocking items, you name it, upstairs as well. It all needs to be sorted and put in places where they can be used. Right now it was a massive mish-mash all over the house and while our sighted family members could find things, my daughter was having to ask.
Tomorrow, with everything in one room, I can begin the sorting process. For now, late as it is, I'm glad Christmas has been contained back in its boxes and bins, destined for the attic tomorrow.
My Anger Management Child: My son has an anger problem. I was fit to be tied with him, while also desperately wanting to praise him and tell him good things about himself. He is doing things that we have to correct as they are directed at other children, some not my own, but all the corrections are hurting his self-image. When he threw a shoe into a bush today and the other father came over to help find it, he told me, "It's because he's a boy. We have the same thing with Jay. We're working on it too." So I don't feel like we've failed completely as parents, I suppose.
The It's Not Fair Child: My daughter was a tattletale and crybaby all day. The trampoline is a lot of fun, but there are hard feelings when you have eight children and only three can jump at a time. It will work itself out when the newness fades. The parents of the other children have been positive and understanding as well as saying they like the trampoline as it's fostering cooperative play.
There were a lot of interruptions—a LOT of interruptions. This trampoline is a great entertainer for the children. It's also a children's magnet. We have had happy children over at our house all day. The children made up games, had conflicts, came to me to mediate, or just resorted to violence or throwing your friend's shoe in the prickly bushes.
But I got the Christmas upstairs. I got all the presents, candy, stocking items, you name it, upstairs as well. It all needs to be sorted and put in places where they can be used. Right now it was a massive mish-mash all over the house and while our sighted family members could find things, my daughter was having to ask.
Tomorrow, with everything in one room, I can begin the sorting process. For now, late as it is, I'm glad Christmas has been contained back in its boxes and bins, destined for the attic tomorrow.
My Anger Management Child: My son has an anger problem. I was fit to be tied with him, while also desperately wanting to praise him and tell him good things about himself. He is doing things that we have to correct as they are directed at other children, some not my own, but all the corrections are hurting his self-image. When he threw a shoe into a bush today and the other father came over to help find it, he told me, "It's because he's a boy. We have the same thing with Jay. We're working on it too." So I don't feel like we've failed completely as parents, I suppose.
The It's Not Fair Child: My daughter was a tattletale and crybaby all day. The trampoline is a lot of fun, but there are hard feelings when you have eight children and only three can jump at a time. It will work itself out when the newness fades. The parents of the other children have been positive and understanding as well as saying they like the trampoline as it's fostering cooperative play.
Saturday, December 28, 2019
Rubik’s Cube
My daughter got a tactile Rubik's Cube for Christmas from Uncle Bob and Uncle Brian. There aren't stickers on the sides, each face has formed plastic in a raised pattern such as a circle, X, square, dots or a square. It's very easy to tell one shape from the other, even for me and my fingertips don't have full feeling in them due to the damage in my spinal cord.
My daughter wanted to work on her Rubik's Cube, my son wanted to play with it and I took a turn at it as well. We had several Rubik's Cubes in the house from different points over the years. We'd didn't have one that was tactile though. I thought I might know where they were but I knew for sure they were scrambled. Now that my daughter's new cube was mixed up though, would it ever be put back in order again?
When the Rubik's Cube first came out I got one after knockoffs came out and the price dropped to much less than the original price. I remember trying to figure it out and making decent progress. I could put all the same color on a single face of the cube. Then I figured out how to put those face pieces so that they matched the adjacent sides, effectively completing one level or row of the cube. The middle row held the center pieces, which are fixed in place, leaving only four edge pieces to put in place to complete the second row, which would have two-thirds of the cube back in place.
Those four pieces were confoundingly hard to do though. I could get them in, but in so doing I'd mess up some of the top layer I'd already completed. I remember eventually figuring out, through trial and error, how to get those four pieces placed. I felt a good bit of pride at this as most of my friends (we all had a cube) hadn't figured out that much.
What we all did figure out how to do was to take the cube apart and put the pieces back in place that way. That was so common among my friends that when I saw a completed cube, I didn't even bother asking if they'd figured out how to solve it.
There was no Internet and no easy way to find out how to solve it back then. This year I decided to give in, after all these years, and learn how to solve the Rubik's Cube once and for all. I felt a bit better after reading on one site that 99.9% of people didn't figure out how to solve it without some help. That night my daughter wanted to know where her cube was, so she could take it to bed with her. I said it was on my nightstand and I was working on it and could I keep it until the morning? My daughter said that would be okay and I told her I would leave it on my nightstand and she could come and see if I had been successful the next morning.
And then I got to learning algorithms. It's not simple. In order to get those pesky second layer edge pieces in place you need to do eight rotations to get the upper layer out of the way, move the edge piece in place and then move the top level back. And there is more than one algorithm because the edge piece might be in one of two orientations. There are five more algorithms for the final layer to position and rotate various pieces while not disrupting what's already in place, some of which require more than eight rotations and may need to be repeated multiple times in several orientations.
To understand the rotation motions you need to first learn a notation scheme for the faces and directions of rotation as well as how to orientate the cube at different times. That was the most confusing. I knew what I was supposed to do only I would rotate one of the faces clockwise when it should have been anticlockwise and wouldn't know which step. I didn't figure this out until completing the sequence so I didn't know how to backtrack to fix it. So I had to reposition what had gotten out of place, which backed me up in the solving by sometimes a good bit.
I went and found, strangely all in the same place and the first place I looked, three additional Rubik's Cubes. But all three were bad. Bad in that they were hard to rotate. I ended up solving all three of them (which are now scrambled again, thanks to my son). By the time I was done with all three, my hands hurt from fighting against catching, sticking and unwilling to rotate cubes.
Back to my daughter's cube though. It's a joy to work with, movement-wise. I've solved it upwards of twenty times now. It's taken most of that time for me to memorize the algorithms and remember which series of steps goes with each situation. I've solved it only a few of those times without having to refer to my notes and have nearly solved the cube close to forty times because I've made a mistake many times and had to start back with only the first layer complete.
It's been fun though. I'm no speed solver on account of the steps I'm using aren't the same as the ones used competitively. There are faster ways, but it involves knowing how the pieces move around the cube and planning out more than one move ahead and multiple things at the same time. For now, just solving it without messing up is my current goal. Fortunately, I have two children eager to give me, "a good scramble" so I can keep practicing.
The Tiny Stocking Swap: Last night at our Hanukkah/Christmas dinner with our neighbors my children had a prank that was going to be played on them by my neighbor's children. They had gone to the Dollar store and other locations to fill stockings for our children. They had found HUGE stockings for them and packed them full of all kinds of things. But they also had a tiny stocking for each of them with only one ring pop in them. They were going to give that to them first and see what they said. When they handed them to my children they each pulled out their ring pop and didn't say anything. They didn't complain at all. I think my children were excited to see what Shane and Blake would be getting in their stockings. We all waited for my children to say something and aside from my son casually saying, without any disappointment in his voice, "this is a really small stocking", they were the picture of graciousness. Blake couldn't take possibly disappointing them so he brought out their stockings. Even my children couldn't believe how much was in them. Shane and Blake liked their stocking contents too. And we all loved the Matzo Ball Soup and Potato Latkes. My children asked when they were going to light the Menorah and when they started to sing, I swear, my daughter sounded like she knew the tune and tried to sing along with them. Everyone had a delightful night. We love our annual gathering with our neighbors.
My daughter wanted to work on her Rubik's Cube, my son wanted to play with it and I took a turn at it as well. We had several Rubik's Cubes in the house from different points over the years. We'd didn't have one that was tactile though. I thought I might know where they were but I knew for sure they were scrambled. Now that my daughter's new cube was mixed up though, would it ever be put back in order again?
When the Rubik's Cube first came out I got one after knockoffs came out and the price dropped to much less than the original price. I remember trying to figure it out and making decent progress. I could put all the same color on a single face of the cube. Then I figured out how to put those face pieces so that they matched the adjacent sides, effectively completing one level or row of the cube. The middle row held the center pieces, which are fixed in place, leaving only four edge pieces to put in place to complete the second row, which would have two-thirds of the cube back in place.
Those four pieces were confoundingly hard to do though. I could get them in, but in so doing I'd mess up some of the top layer I'd already completed. I remember eventually figuring out, through trial and error, how to get those four pieces placed. I felt a good bit of pride at this as most of my friends (we all had a cube) hadn't figured out that much.
What we all did figure out how to do was to take the cube apart and put the pieces back in place that way. That was so common among my friends that when I saw a completed cube, I didn't even bother asking if they'd figured out how to solve it.
There was no Internet and no easy way to find out how to solve it back then. This year I decided to give in, after all these years, and learn how to solve the Rubik's Cube once and for all. I felt a bit better after reading on one site that 99.9% of people didn't figure out how to solve it without some help. That night my daughter wanted to know where her cube was, so she could take it to bed with her. I said it was on my nightstand and I was working on it and could I keep it until the morning? My daughter said that would be okay and I told her I would leave it on my nightstand and she could come and see if I had been successful the next morning.
And then I got to learning algorithms. It's not simple. In order to get those pesky second layer edge pieces in place you need to do eight rotations to get the upper layer out of the way, move the edge piece in place and then move the top level back. And there is more than one algorithm because the edge piece might be in one of two orientations. There are five more algorithms for the final layer to position and rotate various pieces while not disrupting what's already in place, some of which require more than eight rotations and may need to be repeated multiple times in several orientations.
To understand the rotation motions you need to first learn a notation scheme for the faces and directions of rotation as well as how to orientate the cube at different times. That was the most confusing. I knew what I was supposed to do only I would rotate one of the faces clockwise when it should have been anticlockwise and wouldn't know which step. I didn't figure this out until completing the sequence so I didn't know how to backtrack to fix it. So I had to reposition what had gotten out of place, which backed me up in the solving by sometimes a good bit.
I went and found, strangely all in the same place and the first place I looked, three additional Rubik's Cubes. But all three were bad. Bad in that they were hard to rotate. I ended up solving all three of them (which are now scrambled again, thanks to my son). By the time I was done with all three, my hands hurt from fighting against catching, sticking and unwilling to rotate cubes.
Back to my daughter's cube though. It's a joy to work with, movement-wise. I've solved it upwards of twenty times now. It's taken most of that time for me to memorize the algorithms and remember which series of steps goes with each situation. I've solved it only a few of those times without having to refer to my notes and have nearly solved the cube close to forty times because I've made a mistake many times and had to start back with only the first layer complete.
It's been fun though. I'm no speed solver on account of the steps I'm using aren't the same as the ones used competitively. There are faster ways, but it involves knowing how the pieces move around the cube and planning out more than one move ahead and multiple things at the same time. For now, just solving it without messing up is my current goal. Fortunately, I have two children eager to give me, "a good scramble" so I can keep practicing.
The Tiny Stocking Swap: Last night at our Hanukkah/Christmas dinner with our neighbors my children had a prank that was going to be played on them by my neighbor's children. They had gone to the Dollar store and other locations to fill stockings for our children. They had found HUGE stockings for them and packed them full of all kinds of things. But they also had a tiny stocking for each of them with only one ring pop in them. They were going to give that to them first and see what they said. When they handed them to my children they each pulled out their ring pop and didn't say anything. They didn't complain at all. I think my children were excited to see what Shane and Blake would be getting in their stockings. We all waited for my children to say something and aside from my son casually saying, without any disappointment in his voice, "this is a really small stocking", they were the picture of graciousness. Blake couldn't take possibly disappointing them so he brought out their stockings. Even my children couldn't believe how much was in them. Shane and Blake liked their stocking contents too. And we all loved the Matzo Ball Soup and Potato Latkes. My children asked when they were going to light the Menorah and when they started to sing, I swear, my daughter sounded like she knew the tune and tried to sing along with them. Everyone had a delightful night. We love our annual gathering with our neighbors.
Friday, December 27, 2019
Hanukkah & Stockings Dinner
Tonight we're going to our neighbor's house to celebrate Hanukkah and Christmas. Every year the adults make stockings for the other family's children and then my family enjoys a traditional dinner of potato latkes and matza ball soup. There are some things that are different this year surrounding the stockings which I'm interested to see how will play out.
Our neighbor's children are older now and the slime, trinkets and crazy things from the China site I order from are a little too young for our now much more mature sitter children. I have a small iTunes card for each of them, but that doesn't go far when it comes to filling stocking space. There is candy, of which I have a varied collection, including some odd things (my specialty) as well as Christmas themed. But I needed more.
Stephen, their father, laughed and suggested I put mini bottles of alcohol in their stockings—that they'd love that. When their son coincidentally suggested the same thing upon me mentioning my stocking stuffing quandary, it was an easy decision.
I went to the liquor store on the twenty-third of December, a foolish time to go as the parking lot was full and people were parking on the streets. There were three employees there just stocking the shelves, inventory was being depleted so quickly, and all the check out lanes were backed up to the back of the store.
So when I got to the front (after a surprisingly quickly moving line) I asked if he could pick out bottles for me. I figured that would be much quicker and he would have a good idea of what choices to make. Back home, I had plenty to fill both stockings to the top.
The thing I'm wondering about this year is will my son notice much of the candy and some of the trinkets in their stockings were also in his and his sisters. She wouldn't know because she can't see it, but this could be additional data and could finalize his belief that Santa isn't real.
We'll know in a few hours.
The Big Boy Update: My son has been resisting on the reading hour he has to do each day. Today, however, he jumped right in without much ado. Perhaps his book is getting interesting.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter told me this morning, "I need a bigger bowl to put all my candy in." This surprised me because she's been sneakily eating it around the clock. She wanted cake for breakfast as well. She loves sweets.
Our neighbor's children are older now and the slime, trinkets and crazy things from the China site I order from are a little too young for our now much more mature sitter children. I have a small iTunes card for each of them, but that doesn't go far when it comes to filling stocking space. There is candy, of which I have a varied collection, including some odd things (my specialty) as well as Christmas themed. But I needed more.
Stephen, their father, laughed and suggested I put mini bottles of alcohol in their stockings—that they'd love that. When their son coincidentally suggested the same thing upon me mentioning my stocking stuffing quandary, it was an easy decision.
I went to the liquor store on the twenty-third of December, a foolish time to go as the parking lot was full and people were parking on the streets. There were three employees there just stocking the shelves, inventory was being depleted so quickly, and all the check out lanes were backed up to the back of the store.
So when I got to the front (after a surprisingly quickly moving line) I asked if he could pick out bottles for me. I figured that would be much quicker and he would have a good idea of what choices to make. Back home, I had plenty to fill both stockings to the top.
The thing I'm wondering about this year is will my son notice much of the candy and some of the trinkets in their stockings were also in his and his sisters. She wouldn't know because she can't see it, but this could be additional data and could finalize his belief that Santa isn't real.
We'll know in a few hours.
The Big Boy Update: My son has been resisting on the reading hour he has to do each day. Today, however, he jumped right in without much ado. Perhaps his book is getting interesting.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter told me this morning, "I need a bigger bowl to put all my candy in." This surprised me because she's been sneakily eating it around the clock. She wanted cake for breakfast as well. She loves sweets.
Thursday, December 26, 2019
Whirlwind
It looks like my house had a whirlwind go through it. There are things everywhere. My husband and my brothers-in-law went to a movie this afternoon. We had some of the neighbor children come over to try out the trampoline and talk about what each other got for Christmas. They jumped for a while, came in to get some water as jumping is a tiring endeavor, and then, after jumping some more, they came inside to play with other things.
I started in on the large amount of cleaning it's going to take to get the house back in order. Perhaps cleaning isn't the correct word as what mostly needs to be done is rearranging, tidying and putting away. Some things, like all the reusable Amazon bags, are now back at my wrapping station in the craft room. Presents we received are being put in places other than under and around the tree. Some of the things have an obvious home, such as kitchen gadgets, while others don't have a spot yet, like new toys for the children.
And that poses a problem, because my motto (handed down to me by my mother) is, "a place for everything and everything in its place". I need to find homes for everything. There's a balance though. It doesn't make sense to put away all the gifts the children received because we want them out so they see them and want to use them. Or in the case of my daughter, she will know where her things are so she can find them.
Our visiting family members have all gone home. The house is just back to the four of us and the dog. And the happy carnage of Christmas.
The Big Boy Update: My son has to read an hour each day for school during the break. He had yesterday, since it was Christmas day, off. Today he's trying to read but he has too much energy. He's taken two breaks so far during which he went and jumped on the trampoline. And it helped. He was able to come back and refocus on reading without much fuss, something he mentally had a hard time doing in days past.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter has most likely already done her reading for the day. She's been reading in the morning, jumping on the trampoline during the day, listening to audiobooks when she's tired and then she falls asleep early. We have to wake her up for dinner and then she goes to sleep again only to wake up early the next morning.
I started in on the large amount of cleaning it's going to take to get the house back in order. Perhaps cleaning isn't the correct word as what mostly needs to be done is rearranging, tidying and putting away. Some things, like all the reusable Amazon bags, are now back at my wrapping station in the craft room. Presents we received are being put in places other than under and around the tree. Some of the things have an obvious home, such as kitchen gadgets, while others don't have a spot yet, like new toys for the children.
And that poses a problem, because my motto (handed down to me by my mother) is, "a place for everything and everything in its place". I need to find homes for everything. There's a balance though. It doesn't make sense to put away all the gifts the children received because we want them out so they see them and want to use them. Or in the case of my daughter, she will know where her things are so she can find them.
Our visiting family members have all gone home. The house is just back to the four of us and the dog. And the happy carnage of Christmas.
The Big Boy Update: My son has to read an hour each day for school during the break. He had yesterday, since it was Christmas day, off. Today he's trying to read but he has too much energy. He's taken two breaks so far during which he went and jumped on the trampoline. And it helped. He was able to come back and refocus on reading without much fuss, something he mentally had a hard time doing in days past.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter has most likely already done her reading for the day. She's been reading in the morning, jumping on the trampoline during the day, listening to audiobooks when she's tired and then she falls asleep early. We have to wake her up for dinner and then she goes to sleep again only to wake up early the next morning.
Wednesday, December 25, 2019
Cookie Monster
It's Christmas. Was it a good day? How can it not be when there's a trampoline as a surprise in the back yard. I got up to find my son's stocking emptied neatly into a bowl with some stuffed back in and then rehung. I went to find him in the bonus room only to discover my daughter who said she had opened her brother's stocking by accident and only realized it later when she found the piece of paper with her name in braille on the other stocking that had apparently fallen out on the floor.
She had tried to put her brother's stocking back together but couldn't get it all in. She asked me if I had written her name in braille for her stocking. I wasn't sure what to say, but I went with, "yes, I didn't know if Santa knew braille and I thought it might help to let you know which was yours." She told me Santa did know braille because he'd sent her that package last year all in braille. I had forgotten all about that. But I was glad, I told her, that she now had the correct stocking.
Her brother came down a little bit later, saying he hated Christmas. He was upset from the prior evening because he realized he didn't have any presents for family members. I typically take the children to the dollar store and let them pick out something for people but he hadn't wanted to go. I should have tried again or insisted he go the first time. I learned a lesson on that—he really does care, just not necessarily right at the moment I ask him.
We let the children go downstairs and see the large sixty-four piece fort from corrugated cardboard Santa had brought them with a large-sized candy bar at the end of each of the two paths. Then we started opening presents. My husband is the Santa handing out presents and my son is the hyperactive helper. I asked them about ten times to slow down. My mother was trying to take notes for thank you notes (which we are pitifully behind on for both birthday and fundraising for the children). There were conversations surrounding presents as they were opened, the giver explaining what or why it was selected and the overall chaos was high (in my opinion) and I couldn't even follow who was getting what.
My husband got me a present he didn't know he got me. I opened a bag that had in it zip-up furry Cookie Monster pajamas with hood. I put it on for the balance of the present opening and nearly overheated the whole time. If we have a bitterly cold winter, I'll be safely warm by wearing it until the spring thaw.
My son was running around with presents giving them to people, going outside of the duties of Santa's helper. I told my son to stop opening a present for probably the fifth time when my husband said he had told him to go ahead and open it and I just sort of snapped inside mentally. I asked my husband to come upstairs for a minute. Apparently, my husband told me, everyone was having a good time but me. I was the only one that wanted things to go slower and my husband was going slow already and it was going to be mid-afternoon at this rate if he went any slower and next year, no, right now, and forevermore, I would be Santa because he had had enough.
We agreed, next year I will be Santa. Maybe some families let everyone pile through the presents as fast as they can tear through the wrapping (or open the repurposed Amazon bags). It makes me sad, knowing people took the time to get someone a gift and we're not even honoring them enough to pay attention to what those gifts are as a group and, if the person is there, to hear about what the present is or why they selected it. There is only one Christmas each year, I don't see what the rush is—even if there is a surprise trampoline waiting in the back yard.
The trampoline surprise went well with my daughter figuring it out as soon as she had a foot on the step up and a hand on the edge. She was thrilled. A big thanks to Uncle Bob and Uncle Brian for heading out to get the basketball net bolted on and my husband for inflating the ball that came with it. My son was most happy about that.
My parents and in-laws left to go home at that point and I went and had a nap before dinner at 4:30 at my in-law's house. My mother-in-law made a delicious Italian dinner and the sausage balls the children had made with Mimi the day before were eaten and enjoyed by everyone. We're back home now, the house is in disarray and the children and my husband are out on the now wet trampoline in the dark. All signs of a good Christmas, even if it went faster than I wanted it to.
The Big Boy Update: My son watched an episode of The Mandalorian with his father last night on Disney +. He and my husband really liked it. I hear Baby Yoda is way too cute. I need to log in to Disney + and check it out myself.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter still believes in Santa Claus. She doesn't even question it yet. She loved her presents today and was gracious and thankful to everyone.
What My Husband Likes: My husband has been against getting a trampoline for years. No way, he would say. Then, suddenly, he wanted to get one this year and so it was decided without even much conversation. My son is hyperactive and always needs to burn energy and my daughter would love it from the motion perspective and that it would be a safe enclosure for her to move around vigorously. Tonight he came in from jumping in the dark just now and said, "I really like the trampoline." He likes it for him. He's loving jumping on it too. Full family win.
She had tried to put her brother's stocking back together but couldn't get it all in. She asked me if I had written her name in braille for her stocking. I wasn't sure what to say, but I went with, "yes, I didn't know if Santa knew braille and I thought it might help to let you know which was yours." She told me Santa did know braille because he'd sent her that package last year all in braille. I had forgotten all about that. But I was glad, I told her, that she now had the correct stocking.
Her brother came down a little bit later, saying he hated Christmas. He was upset from the prior evening because he realized he didn't have any presents for family members. I typically take the children to the dollar store and let them pick out something for people but he hadn't wanted to go. I should have tried again or insisted he go the first time. I learned a lesson on that—he really does care, just not necessarily right at the moment I ask him.
We let the children go downstairs and see the large sixty-four piece fort from corrugated cardboard Santa had brought them with a large-sized candy bar at the end of each of the two paths. Then we started opening presents. My husband is the Santa handing out presents and my son is the hyperactive helper. I asked them about ten times to slow down. My mother was trying to take notes for thank you notes (which we are pitifully behind on for both birthday and fundraising for the children). There were conversations surrounding presents as they were opened, the giver explaining what or why it was selected and the overall chaos was high (in my opinion) and I couldn't even follow who was getting what.
My husband got me a present he didn't know he got me. I opened a bag that had in it zip-up furry Cookie Monster pajamas with hood. I put it on for the balance of the present opening and nearly overheated the whole time. If we have a bitterly cold winter, I'll be safely warm by wearing it until the spring thaw.
My son was running around with presents giving them to people, going outside of the duties of Santa's helper. I told my son to stop opening a present for probably the fifth time when my husband said he had told him to go ahead and open it and I just sort of snapped inside mentally. I asked my husband to come upstairs for a minute. Apparently, my husband told me, everyone was having a good time but me. I was the only one that wanted things to go slower and my husband was going slow already and it was going to be mid-afternoon at this rate if he went any slower and next year, no, right now, and forevermore, I would be Santa because he had had enough.
We agreed, next year I will be Santa. Maybe some families let everyone pile through the presents as fast as they can tear through the wrapping (or open the repurposed Amazon bags). It makes me sad, knowing people took the time to get someone a gift and we're not even honoring them enough to pay attention to what those gifts are as a group and, if the person is there, to hear about what the present is or why they selected it. There is only one Christmas each year, I don't see what the rush is—even if there is a surprise trampoline waiting in the back yard.
The trampoline surprise went well with my daughter figuring it out as soon as she had a foot on the step up and a hand on the edge. She was thrilled. A big thanks to Uncle Bob and Uncle Brian for heading out to get the basketball net bolted on and my husband for inflating the ball that came with it. My son was most happy about that.
My parents and in-laws left to go home at that point and I went and had a nap before dinner at 4:30 at my in-law's house. My mother-in-law made a delicious Italian dinner and the sausage balls the children had made with Mimi the day before were eaten and enjoyed by everyone. We're back home now, the house is in disarray and the children and my husband are out on the now wet trampoline in the dark. All signs of a good Christmas, even if it went faster than I wanted it to.
The Big Boy Update: My son watched an episode of The Mandalorian with his father last night on Disney +. He and my husband really liked it. I hear Baby Yoda is way too cute. I need to log in to Disney + and check it out myself.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter still believes in Santa Claus. She doesn't even question it yet. She loved her presents today and was gracious and thankful to everyone.
What My Husband Likes: My husband has been against getting a trampoline for years. No way, he would say. Then, suddenly, he wanted to get one this year and so it was decided without even much conversation. My son is hyperactive and always needs to burn energy and my daughter would love it from the motion perspective and that it would be a safe enclosure for her to move around vigorously. Tonight he came in from jumping in the dark just now and said, "I really like the trampoline." He likes it for him. He's loving jumping on it too. Full family win.
Tuesday, December 24, 2019
Wet Pants
My mother came to the house and took my children to their home today to make sausage balls and to keep them away from the house so we could set up the trampoline we're getting them for Christmas. Not Santa, there are too many people (children) who could see it happening.
Uncle Bob, Uncle Brian, my husband and I worked for several hours and figured out how to get the springless trampoline into springing mode. We finished as it got dark. My husband had stepped inside to make dinner before my in-laws and parents arrived while Uncle Brian and I finished putting the basketball net up.
The longest portion of the setup involved me, sitting underneath the mat, helping guide the springs into the locking joints. This wasn't simple and required strength, coordination, and fitness. My job was to sit underneath the mat, press my heat up and into the mat as hard as I could while helping guide the bar the guys were pushing down with great strength. We all had our jobs, mine involved sitting in wet, soggy grass for two hours. My pants were cold and wet and I was glad to be done so I could get dry clothes on.
My children arrived home and we had a lovely dinner of roast (not roast beast, just roast) and as we ate it grew hot in the dining room. Uncle Bob mentioned menopause and I laughed and agreed, I might be suffering from hot flashes.
It was shortly after that that my son decided to step out onto the deck—because the door was cracked open—and saw the trampoline. If you're counting, that's minus twelve points for mom. My husband and I talked to my son and he agreed not to tell until the morning. Then, he told us, he would tell his sister he knew tonight. I asked him how that would make his sister feel and he said, "upset". After thinking about it I think he has agreed not to tell her he found out early.
Tomorrow will be fun in a lot of ways. Christmas morning is always a fun time, even if my son fount out about the largest present (dimensionally). There are other fun presents for them from family and friends.
The Santa Conspiracy My Son Believes In: My son explained at the dinner table (after his sister left) that he knew there was no Santa. He was vocal and firm about it. No one confirmed his belief and he didn't ask for confirmation, perhaps because he wasn't that sure. I told him it was okay, he didn't have to believe if he didn't want to. And I left it at that and moved on to talk to one of the adults.
The Tiny Girl Asleep Chronicles: My daughter fell asleep at my parent's house today. She came home and almost fell asleep again here until we roused her for dinner. She will fall asleep soon, only to be awake early for Christmas morning. She and her brother know they can go through their stockings before we wake up, but can't go downstairs.
Uncle Bob, Uncle Brian, my husband and I worked for several hours and figured out how to get the springless trampoline into springing mode. We finished as it got dark. My husband had stepped inside to make dinner before my in-laws and parents arrived while Uncle Brian and I finished putting the basketball net up.
The longest portion of the setup involved me, sitting underneath the mat, helping guide the springs into the locking joints. This wasn't simple and required strength, coordination, and fitness. My job was to sit underneath the mat, press my heat up and into the mat as hard as I could while helping guide the bar the guys were pushing down with great strength. We all had our jobs, mine involved sitting in wet, soggy grass for two hours. My pants were cold and wet and I was glad to be done so I could get dry clothes on.
My children arrived home and we had a lovely dinner of roast (not roast beast, just roast) and as we ate it grew hot in the dining room. Uncle Bob mentioned menopause and I laughed and agreed, I might be suffering from hot flashes.
It was shortly after that that my son decided to step out onto the deck—because the door was cracked open—and saw the trampoline. If you're counting, that's minus twelve points for mom. My husband and I talked to my son and he agreed not to tell until the morning. Then, he told us, he would tell his sister he knew tonight. I asked him how that would make his sister feel and he said, "upset". After thinking about it I think he has agreed not to tell her he found out early.
Tomorrow will be fun in a lot of ways. Christmas morning is always a fun time, even if my son fount out about the largest present (dimensionally). There are other fun presents for them from family and friends.
The Santa Conspiracy My Son Believes In: My son explained at the dinner table (after his sister left) that he knew there was no Santa. He was vocal and firm about it. No one confirmed his belief and he didn't ask for confirmation, perhaps because he wasn't that sure. I told him it was okay, he didn't have to believe if he didn't want to. And I left it at that and moved on to talk to one of the adults.
The Tiny Girl Asleep Chronicles: My daughter fell asleep at my parent's house today. She came home and almost fell asleep again here until we roused her for dinner. She will fall asleep soon, only to be awake early for Christmas morning. She and her brother know they can go through their stockings before we wake up, but can't go downstairs.
Monday, December 23, 2019
Eye of the Storm
We're in the eye of the holiday storm. There is the increasing flurry of activity to order presents, decorate the house, go to holiday school, friend and family events, bake, wrap presents and prepare for incoming family before Christmas. The children are out of school now and we're ready for Christmas. We have things to do, but it's all under control. We're almost in a waiting state until Christmas actually arrives.
It's a little like the eye of the storm. It's a calm period before the chaos and excitement and fun of Christmas day itself. And then, once the presents are opened and the meals have been eaten, you look around and realize you have more of a mess now than you did before.
My children are excited about Christmas. They don't know what they'll be getting and haven't made any big requests. We think they'll be excited though with an idea my husband had. I'll let you know how it turns out in two days' time.
For now, I'm enjoying having nothing to wrap, nothing to buy and the stockings are even stuffed already. We kick into high gear tomorrow afternoon. Tomorrow morning I might even try to sleep in.
The Big Boy Update: My son stayed up and watched Percy Jackson: The Lightning Thief tonight. I watched a good bit of it with him. He loved it. He wants to see the second movie before he reads the book this time.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter was creating a Mad Libs this evening on her braillewriter. I was at my best friend's house when she called me to ask for some nouns, adjectives, numbers and even a pronoun. When I got home she asked me for a few more words. As we were talking about parts of speech she said, "my favorite type of verb is a past tense one."
It's a little like the eye of the storm. It's a calm period before the chaos and excitement and fun of Christmas day itself. And then, once the presents are opened and the meals have been eaten, you look around and realize you have more of a mess now than you did before.
My children are excited about Christmas. They don't know what they'll be getting and haven't made any big requests. We think they'll be excited though with an idea my husband had. I'll let you know how it turns out in two days' time.
For now, I'm enjoying having nothing to wrap, nothing to buy and the stockings are even stuffed already. We kick into high gear tomorrow afternoon. Tomorrow morning I might even try to sleep in.
The Big Boy Update: My son stayed up and watched Percy Jackson: The Lightning Thief tonight. I watched a good bit of it with him. He loved it. He wants to see the second movie before he reads the book this time.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter was creating a Mad Libs this evening on her braillewriter. I was at my best friend's house when she called me to ask for some nouns, adjectives, numbers and even a pronoun. When I got home she asked me for a few more words. As we were talking about parts of speech she said, "my favorite type of verb is a past tense one."
Sunday, December 22, 2019
Feeling the Fossils
I've said many times how fortunate we are to have such dedicated and kind teachers for my daughter. We love my daughter's prior braillest, Mrs. Aagaard, who retired after my daughter's kindergarten year. We see her regularly as we meet up at festivals. After she retired, my daughter had a new braillest assigned and I won't lie, we got exactly who we hoped we would get. A child's braillest stays with them across grades and in this case, my daughter will have Ms. B until she goes to middle school. Which is wonderful, because we all love Ms. B.
I've put pictures up before of the work Ms. B. does to provide my daughter with "consumable" versions of all the work her sighted classmates are doing. My daughter doesn't have any trouble at all completing work as long as she can understand what the work is. Photocopied sheets don't work for her. For example, here's some work the students did earlier this month. They were given five pictures of fossils and told to sort them into three categories: fossils preserved in sap, fossils preserved in tar, and body fossils. Their sheet of fossils to sort looked like this:
The students cut out the pictures and put them on a second sheet, sorted by type. Ms. B. prepared the five fossils for my daughter each on a small piece of braille paper. My daughter felt each one and then pasted them down on the appropriate sheet. Here's my daughter's completed work after she's done the sorting. But that's not the important bit here. Look at what Ms. B. did to make a tactile version of each fossil pictured above.
I know, amazing, right? I use the word, "humbled" a lot when I talk about what our teachers do to help my daughter. It's the best word though; I am truly humbled by what Ms. B. and the other teachers do to give my daughter the same education her sighted peers have. We're so glad we have Ms. B. as my daughter's braillest. I know she reads this blog, so here's a huge thank you from our family and friends for all you do. We are all so very grateful.
What I can Read Now: I did it! I achieved reading a piece of braille that I've been wanting to understand for several years. I couldn't do so until now because it's fully contracted and I couldn't read all the contractions so historically I'd give up or compare it to the printed words to figure it out. I'll paste it here and you can see if you can guess what it is. It's something I've seen in many different buildings and it's almost guaranteed to be in most large commercial buildings.
I've put pictures up before of the work Ms. B. does to provide my daughter with "consumable" versions of all the work her sighted classmates are doing. My daughter doesn't have any trouble at all completing work as long as she can understand what the work is. Photocopied sheets don't work for her. For example, here's some work the students did earlier this month. They were given five pictures of fossils and told to sort them into three categories: fossils preserved in sap, fossils preserved in tar, and body fossils. Their sheet of fossils to sort looked like this:
The students cut out the pictures and put them on a second sheet, sorted by type. Ms. B. prepared the five fossils for my daughter each on a small piece of braille paper. My daughter felt each one and then pasted them down on the appropriate sheet. Here's my daughter's completed work after she's done the sorting. But that's not the important bit here. Look at what Ms. B. did to make a tactile version of each fossil pictured above.
I know, amazing, right? I use the word, "humbled" a lot when I talk about what our teachers do to help my daughter. It's the best word though; I am truly humbled by what Ms. B. and the other teachers do to give my daughter the same education her sighted peers have. We're so glad we have Ms. B. as my daughter's braillest. I know she reads this blog, so here's a huge thank you from our family and friends for all you do. We are all so very grateful.
What I can Read Now: I did it! I achieved reading a piece of braille that I've been wanting to understand for several years. I couldn't do so until now because it's fully contracted and I couldn't read all the contractions so historically I'd give up or compare it to the printed words to figure it out. I'll paste it here and you can see if you can guess what it is. It's something I've seen in many different buildings and it's almost guaranteed to be in most large commercial buildings.
If you guessed the baby changing station instructions in the handicapped stall of public bathrooms, you get three points.
What My Son Has To Do: My son has to read a rather large book over the break. There are zero pictures. We're setting aside time every day for him to read and rewarding him with additional screen time to match any reading he does over the allotted fifteen minutes. I mentioned the reading this morning and he wailed and put his hands over his ears. He loves reading when he's interested. He's out of school on a long break though and I don't think any books are interesting to him right now.
What My Daughter Can Draw: My daughter's ability to draw has declined since she first lost her vision. I remember her drawing the print letters, again and again, two years or so ago, trying to get the shape of them correct, even though she couldn't see where she'd started the letter and would get off track by the end of the character. On paper she would put her fingers right at the tip of the sharpie (which we used because she could see them more easily) and get ink all over her hand and face. She stopped trying to draw for a long while though. But she's started up again recently and is getting better and better even though she can't see what she's drawing at all. Here's Olaf she drew the other day.
Saturday, December 21, 2019
Audiobooks
I'm torn on audiobooks for my children. I love audiobooks and have a membership to Audible that I take advantage of regularly for both the children and me. I can get a book, let's see, "read" isn't the best term so let's use "listened to" a lot more easily than I can via reading alone. This is due to the simultaneousness audiobooks afford you that reading alone doesn't. You can't (or shouldn't) read and drive at the same time but you can listen and drive easily.
I do lots of things while listening to an audiobook. My children tend to be more single-focused when they listen. My daughter likes to sit at the bar seats in the kitchen beside the Alexa and listen. She will also go to other rooms that have an Alexa or ask to have the book played on her iPad and lie on her bed or in a chair.
My son likes to be more active, usually bouncing around in his room, swinging swords around, or putting together Plus Plus tiles. From an audiobook standpoint for my son, I'm a bit torn. I like that he's enjoying the book and it's something he likes doing when he's inside and he doesn't have screen time available. But we want him to spend time reading books as well. He reads well for his age and will tear through a book when he's interested in it. He's beyond the initial "chapter books" children start reading and can read anything now, provided he's interested in it.
For my daughter, given that she can't do anything on a screen, the audiobooks are a good break for her. It's something she can do that doesn't involve any chance of injuring herself. She doesn't need help to listen and she gets to hear complex stories that go beyond the level of reading she's at currently.
We also want her to read, but her reading is limited to what she has printed up by her braillest right now. We get some books from the Library for the Blind and Physically Handicapped, but we're requesting uncontracted braille books currently since she can't fully read all the contractions, and that limits the complexity and age-level of the books available. Soon enough she will be able to read fully contracted braille, which will open up a large selection of books for her.
A lot of families have Family Movie Night or a time where they get together and watch a show or a movie together. This almost never happens here. My daughter can't watch a movie and rarely agrees to listen to one. My son isn't that interested in movies unless we conscript him to watching one and then, five minutes in, he's engrossed in it. For the most part, he has no interest. Tonight we suggested, A Christmas Story, How The Grinch Stole Christmas, Elf, and A Charlie Brown Christmas. He didn't want to see any of them. Because my son didn't want to watch a movie he decided to listen to an audiobook instead. Which has me thinking: Is that something I should limit provided he does a reasonable amount of reading? I'm still undecided on what's a reasonable balance.
Almost all the audiobooks I get are for my daughter given it's a medium she enjoys and because she can't watch most things and understand what's going on from sound alone. For her, I will get her as many audiobooks as she'd like to listen to. A bored blind child who has an active mind is a tough thing and we try to keep her mentally engaged however we can.
So on the whole, I love audiobooks. I'm very glad there are so many options these days. Couple that with the ease of downloading them and the myriad ways they can be played and it's a good solution for three of the four members of my family. My husband, not so much. He's more of a movie guy. He took me to the opening day of Star Wars yesterday morning. I go to about one movie a year. It was definitely a good choice.
My Son's Technical Knowledge: Last night my son's iPad did an overnight software update. This morning it was asking for information he didn't know how to answer as it finalized the update so he brought it to me for help. As I was working on it it seemed sluggish and response-delayed, something I didn't think it should be doing. I asked him if it was always this slow. He told me, "Usually it's down to the millisecond." He had not a clue what that meant, but it sounded good so I told him I was glad it was that fast as I handed it back to him.
What My Daughter Woke Up and Said: My daughter fell asleep after dinner on our bed. As I'm writing this she sat up, looked at me and said, "Am I in Vocabulary?" I told her, "no, you're in the bedroom with me." She looked around and said, "I don't know why I would think that. I know it's a collection of letters, but I don't know what that means right now." Then she asked me if I could cover her up with all the blankets, as she pulled one over herself and fell immediately back to sleep. This is good because her brother is in their bedroom listening to the audiobook Percy Jackson and The Lightning Thief marathon-fashion because his father told him there was a movie but he had to finish listening to the book before he could watch it.
I do lots of things while listening to an audiobook. My children tend to be more single-focused when they listen. My daughter likes to sit at the bar seats in the kitchen beside the Alexa and listen. She will also go to other rooms that have an Alexa or ask to have the book played on her iPad and lie on her bed or in a chair.
My son likes to be more active, usually bouncing around in his room, swinging swords around, or putting together Plus Plus tiles. From an audiobook standpoint for my son, I'm a bit torn. I like that he's enjoying the book and it's something he likes doing when he's inside and he doesn't have screen time available. But we want him to spend time reading books as well. He reads well for his age and will tear through a book when he's interested in it. He's beyond the initial "chapter books" children start reading and can read anything now, provided he's interested in it.
For my daughter, given that she can't do anything on a screen, the audiobooks are a good break for her. It's something she can do that doesn't involve any chance of injuring herself. She doesn't need help to listen and she gets to hear complex stories that go beyond the level of reading she's at currently.
We also want her to read, but her reading is limited to what she has printed up by her braillest right now. We get some books from the Library for the Blind and Physically Handicapped, but we're requesting uncontracted braille books currently since she can't fully read all the contractions, and that limits the complexity and age-level of the books available. Soon enough she will be able to read fully contracted braille, which will open up a large selection of books for her.
A lot of families have Family Movie Night or a time where they get together and watch a show or a movie together. This almost never happens here. My daughter can't watch a movie and rarely agrees to listen to one. My son isn't that interested in movies unless we conscript him to watching one and then, five minutes in, he's engrossed in it. For the most part, he has no interest. Tonight we suggested, A Christmas Story, How The Grinch Stole Christmas, Elf, and A Charlie Brown Christmas. He didn't want to see any of them. Because my son didn't want to watch a movie he decided to listen to an audiobook instead. Which has me thinking: Is that something I should limit provided he does a reasonable amount of reading? I'm still undecided on what's a reasonable balance.
Almost all the audiobooks I get are for my daughter given it's a medium she enjoys and because she can't watch most things and understand what's going on from sound alone. For her, I will get her as many audiobooks as she'd like to listen to. A bored blind child who has an active mind is a tough thing and we try to keep her mentally engaged however we can.
So on the whole, I love audiobooks. I'm very glad there are so many options these days. Couple that with the ease of downloading them and the myriad ways they can be played and it's a good solution for three of the four members of my family. My husband, not so much. He's more of a movie guy. He took me to the opening day of Star Wars yesterday morning. I go to about one movie a year. It was definitely a good choice.
My Son's Technical Knowledge: Last night my son's iPad did an overnight software update. This morning it was asking for information he didn't know how to answer as it finalized the update so he brought it to me for help. As I was working on it it seemed sluggish and response-delayed, something I didn't think it should be doing. I asked him if it was always this slow. He told me, "Usually it's down to the millisecond." He had not a clue what that meant, but it sounded good so I told him I was glad it was that fast as I handed it back to him.
What My Daughter Woke Up and Said: My daughter fell asleep after dinner on our bed. As I'm writing this she sat up, looked at me and said, "Am I in Vocabulary?" I told her, "no, you're in the bedroom with me." She looked around and said, "I don't know why I would think that. I know it's a collection of letters, but I don't know what that means right now." Then she asked me if I could cover her up with all the blankets, as she pulled one over herself and fell immediately back to sleep. This is good because her brother is in their bedroom listening to the audiobook Percy Jackson and The Lightning Thief marathon-fashion because his father told him there was a movie but he had to finish listening to the book before he could watch it.
Friday, December 20, 2019
Brightness Matters
My daughter and her best friend, Madison, do a lot of playing together in our house. Over the past several months, they've taken to finding hiding places to create a secret place to play. A lot of these places have been closets into which they pile blankets, pillows, and stuffed animals. We've admonished them several times that food isn't allowed in these places, and that includes dog treats, which they use to entice the dog to join them in their escapades.
One thing I've noticed recently is wherever they go, the room they're in has the blinds shut. We keep our blinds open to allow light into the house. Some people prefer to have the blinds closed for sleeping, but we've never done that for the children. Which has had me wondering why they would shut them.
I asked a few times and got different answers. Initially, my daughter said it was Madison who was shutting the blinds. They were playing family or baby or pet doctor, and whatever they were doing required the blinds to be closed so the baby could have a nap, for instance.
I got a different answer yesterday when I asked my daughter though. She said she had been closing the blinds. When I asked her why she said because she could see better. This was the first time she's said anything in a long time about being able to see differently based on lighting.
I let it drop because I know I won't get additional information out of her if I press for more information, but I kept it in mind and brought it back up today. This evening I asked again about the blinds and lighting and could she tell me what lighting made it easier to see? We did some tests with the lights in the kitchen and some lighting (overhead) she preferred if they were dimmed a good bit. Other lighting, while indirect, was "ow, too bright" even though it seemed to me to give less overall light to the room.
Her irises are scarred open from the very first day in 2015 when the infection damaged her eyes. Her then blue eyes turned a dull grey when the under layers of the irises were exposes from the damage. Because of this, her eyes can't adjust to lighting like normal eyes do. We've wondered if bright lights and sunlight bother her, but she never says they do. This preference for dim lighting is a new development though. She's given up almost completely on seeing, which makes this exciting in a way. I don't think she's seeing much, but she knows she can see more in some situations.
It's not much, but any improvement with her ability to see is worth accommodating her if she wants it.
The Big Boy Update: My son came home today and was granted some free screen time. He went downstairs and got on the Xbox and played in creative mode in Fortnite for several hours trying to recreate a "glitch" with a shopping cart and Millennium Falcon parachute. I heard him excitedly yelling and talking to the television as he failed multiple times and then was successful. He had me come watch him for a bit so he could show me the glitch he was so proud of finding.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter has five large volumes of a book she has to read over track out. She doesn't go back to school until January 27th. Five weeks out of school. It's her longest break of the year.
One thing I've noticed recently is wherever they go, the room they're in has the blinds shut. We keep our blinds open to allow light into the house. Some people prefer to have the blinds closed for sleeping, but we've never done that for the children. Which has had me wondering why they would shut them.
I asked a few times and got different answers. Initially, my daughter said it was Madison who was shutting the blinds. They were playing family or baby or pet doctor, and whatever they were doing required the blinds to be closed so the baby could have a nap, for instance.
I got a different answer yesterday when I asked my daughter though. She said she had been closing the blinds. When I asked her why she said because she could see better. This was the first time she's said anything in a long time about being able to see differently based on lighting.
I let it drop because I know I won't get additional information out of her if I press for more information, but I kept it in mind and brought it back up today. This evening I asked again about the blinds and lighting and could she tell me what lighting made it easier to see? We did some tests with the lights in the kitchen and some lighting (overhead) she preferred if they were dimmed a good bit. Other lighting, while indirect, was "ow, too bright" even though it seemed to me to give less overall light to the room.
Her irises are scarred open from the very first day in 2015 when the infection damaged her eyes. Her then blue eyes turned a dull grey when the under layers of the irises were exposes from the damage. Because of this, her eyes can't adjust to lighting like normal eyes do. We've wondered if bright lights and sunlight bother her, but she never says they do. This preference for dim lighting is a new development though. She's given up almost completely on seeing, which makes this exciting in a way. I don't think she's seeing much, but she knows she can see more in some situations.
It's not much, but any improvement with her ability to see is worth accommodating her if she wants it.
The Big Boy Update: My son came home today and was granted some free screen time. He went downstairs and got on the Xbox and played in creative mode in Fortnite for several hours trying to recreate a "glitch" with a shopping cart and Millennium Falcon parachute. I heard him excitedly yelling and talking to the television as he failed multiple times and then was successful. He had me come watch him for a bit so he could show me the glitch he was so proud of finding.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter has five large volumes of a book she has to read over track out. She doesn't go back to school until January 27th. Five weeks out of school. It's her longest break of the year.
Thursday, December 19, 2019
If It Isn’t The Parents...
At what point do children stop believing in Santa Claus? It's different ages depending on lots of factors, siblings, friends, parents slipping up being the biggest culprits of Santa Demystification. For me, I don't remember the age I was, but it was my cousin who had undeniable evidence she presented to me one holiday season about how she saw her bicycle, hidden in the shed in the back yard days before the 25th, only to be told it was Santa who delivered it on his sled on Christmas Eve.
I didn't want to believe her, but with evidence like that, it shook my steadfast belief enough that by the following year, I no longer believed. I'm not certain if I told my parents immediately; it was clear they were trying to maintain the ruse for me and I didn't want to accuse them of chicanery, knowing it was done so that I got presents, for free.
We didn't want to have Santa for our family, but it was too prevalent in our society to do away with it altogether. "What do you want from Santa" and "What did Santa give you for Christmas?" being questions asked by young and old across the board surrounding the Christmas holiday.
So instead, we decided to have a single gift, typically something large in size or value to the children. My son, we think, is starting to question the whole Santa situation. This morning in the car we were talking about plans for the break as tomorrow is their last day of school before the holiday break. I wasn't even talking about Santa but my son decided to throw out there, "That is if it isn't the parents, putting things under the tree."
This may be the last year for him. I wonder if he'll spoil it for his sister or if he'll let her believe until she starts to question it herself. I didn't confirm or deny his statement, I just changed the subject. Knowing him and his desire to be a know-it-all, he'll be sure to tell her his theory the next time it comes up.
The Big Boy Update: My son and husband are currently doing a scientific experiment. Thet have three surfaces: a plate, the counter, and a fast defrost plate. They're seeing which one melts an ice cube the quickest. The fast defrost plate was a gift from my father several years ago that my husband uses regularly to defrost meats. It's impressive how much more quickly the material of the metal plate pulls heat away from things. They're timing it to see exactly how long it takes each surface to melt an ice cube.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter just ran into the wall and screamed. She runs into things all the time. She had come to talk to me about an altercation with her brother and on leaving, ran right into the wall and hit her eye. I told her to scream. To just scream and get out the frustration. I've been there so many times and I hate that she runs into things all the time. Considering how very little she can see, she does an outstanding job of avoiding most obstacles, but it still happens.
I didn't want to believe her, but with evidence like that, it shook my steadfast belief enough that by the following year, I no longer believed. I'm not certain if I told my parents immediately; it was clear they were trying to maintain the ruse for me and I didn't want to accuse them of chicanery, knowing it was done so that I got presents, for free.
We didn't want to have Santa for our family, but it was too prevalent in our society to do away with it altogether. "What do you want from Santa" and "What did Santa give you for Christmas?" being questions asked by young and old across the board surrounding the Christmas holiday.
So instead, we decided to have a single gift, typically something large in size or value to the children. My son, we think, is starting to question the whole Santa situation. This morning in the car we were talking about plans for the break as tomorrow is their last day of school before the holiday break. I wasn't even talking about Santa but my son decided to throw out there, "That is if it isn't the parents, putting things under the tree."
This may be the last year for him. I wonder if he'll spoil it for his sister or if he'll let her believe until she starts to question it herself. I didn't confirm or deny his statement, I just changed the subject. Knowing him and his desire to be a know-it-all, he'll be sure to tell her his theory the next time it comes up.
The Big Boy Update: My son and husband are currently doing a scientific experiment. Thet have three surfaces: a plate, the counter, and a fast defrost plate. They're seeing which one melts an ice cube the quickest. The fast defrost plate was a gift from my father several years ago that my husband uses regularly to defrost meats. It's impressive how much more quickly the material of the metal plate pulls heat away from things. They're timing it to see exactly how long it takes each surface to melt an ice cube.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter just ran into the wall and screamed. She runs into things all the time. She had come to talk to me about an altercation with her brother and on leaving, ran right into the wall and hit her eye. I told her to scream. To just scream and get out the frustration. I've been there so many times and I hate that she runs into things all the time. Considering how very little she can see, she does an outstanding job of avoiding most obstacles, but it still happens.
Wednesday, December 18, 2019
It’s So Far Away It’s Almost Here
When I was a child at this point in the month of December, Christmas was incredibly far off. I mean there were two days of school left, a weekend and then days to go before a whole week had passed and I finally got to open my gifts and see what Santa had brought me.
I remember the foreverness of the long, drawn-out month that is December when you're a child. As an adult with children, the month looks altogether different. Christmas is barreling down on us, not caring if I've got time to get everything done or even parts of my lists complete.
I was out in the garage looking for something for my daughter for Holiday Hat Day tomorrow and I realized I didn't get nearly the decorating done I would have liked to have gotten to. Then I think about the cleaning up and putting up and I'm glad not everything is out. There's enough and what's out, looks nice and that's that.
I've been tackling other areas of the perpetual parental pile in recent days. I had to get caught up on emails, because they were getting out of hand. Today I got back to zero, which makes me internally giddy in a way like nothing else can. In the meantime though, this happened:
This is braille work that needs reading through and any other paperwork I have to do something with. I had just gotten this stack down before we moved out of the house for renovations. Tomorrow, along with holiday this and that, I'm going to have to do a good bit of braille reading.
The Big Boy Update: My son, on bounding up the stairs to his top bunk, slipped and hit his shin badly. He screamed louder than I've heard him do so before. I got an ice pack and my husband sat on the floor of the hall while my son kept saying, "I want to die." It hurt a whole lot I'm guessing. We let him take the ice pack to bed and I gave him something to help with inflammation and pain. It's going to be a bad bruise in the morning given how fast it turned purple tonight.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter and I wrapped her presents for family and friends tonight. All of her presents are in one box under the tree. They have a brailled name on them so she can hand out her presents all by herself. The one I'm the most excited about is for her father. I can't explain until after Christmas. For a dollar, it's my favorite present of the season.
I remember the foreverness of the long, drawn-out month that is December when you're a child. As an adult with children, the month looks altogether different. Christmas is barreling down on us, not caring if I've got time to get everything done or even parts of my lists complete.
I was out in the garage looking for something for my daughter for Holiday Hat Day tomorrow and I realized I didn't get nearly the decorating done I would have liked to have gotten to. Then I think about the cleaning up and putting up and I'm glad not everything is out. There's enough and what's out, looks nice and that's that.
I've been tackling other areas of the perpetual parental pile in recent days. I had to get caught up on emails, because they were getting out of hand. Today I got back to zero, which makes me internally giddy in a way like nothing else can. In the meantime though, this happened:
This is braille work that needs reading through and any other paperwork I have to do something with. I had just gotten this stack down before we moved out of the house for renovations. Tomorrow, along with holiday this and that, I'm going to have to do a good bit of braille reading.
The Big Boy Update: My son, on bounding up the stairs to his top bunk, slipped and hit his shin badly. He screamed louder than I've heard him do so before. I got an ice pack and my husband sat on the floor of the hall while my son kept saying, "I want to die." It hurt a whole lot I'm guessing. We let him take the ice pack to bed and I gave him something to help with inflammation and pain. It's going to be a bad bruise in the morning given how fast it turned purple tonight.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter and I wrapped her presents for family and friends tonight. All of her presents are in one box under the tree. They have a brailled name on them so she can hand out her presents all by herself. The one I'm the most excited about is for her father. I can't explain until after Christmas. For a dollar, it's my favorite present of the season.
Tuesday, December 17, 2019
Maths
I've been watching a lot of what I suppose could be called nerdy math videos lately. Festival of the Spoken Nerd, Steve Mould, Matt Parker, Objectivity, Numberphile. Binging on these maths-based YouTube channels and other related videos. Oh, and podcasts.
I've heard the team "maths" used so much over the American preferred "math" that I don't hear the British accents or the usage of "maths". I'm cutting this short tonight to go watch some more.
The Big Boy Update: My son went to a school gaming night and fundraiser for the Upper Elementary Yellowstone trip in the spring. He played Mancala and enjoyed spending time with his classmates and other friends out of school.
The Tiny Girl Chronicle: Tomorrow is crazy hair day at my daughter's school. We decided on red and green ribbons in her hair, which is doable. She had some other ideas that weren't so easily done. Speaking of hair, I know she wasn't trying to cut her hair, but I found a large chunk on her desk, besides some scissors where she had been cutting paper. I told her to put her hair up in the future so she didn't accidentally cut her hair
I've heard the team "maths" used so much over the American preferred "math" that I don't hear the British accents or the usage of "maths". I'm cutting this short tonight to go watch some more.
The Big Boy Update: My son went to a school gaming night and fundraiser for the Upper Elementary Yellowstone trip in the spring. He played Mancala and enjoyed spending time with his classmates and other friends out of school.
The Tiny Girl Chronicle: Tomorrow is crazy hair day at my daughter's school. We decided on red and green ribbons in her hair, which is doable. She had some other ideas that weren't so easily done. Speaking of hair, I know she wasn't trying to cut her hair, but I found a large chunk on her desk, besides some scissors where she had been cutting paper. I told her to put her hair up in the future so she didn't accidentally cut her hair
Monday, December 16, 2019
Looking Blind
I remember the first time I saw my daughter after the original insult to her her eyes when I noticed she wasn't looking "at" anything. I felt despair, is the only thing I remember from the time. There she was, doing something or another, and she wasn't even trying to see what it was. She was using her hands or listening or something. I don't remember where it was, other than it was on the main floor of our house. I don't know what my daughter was doing either. What I do remember was how I felt.
I thought this couldn't be the case. Surely, we could do something—doctors could do something—to return her vision. This wasn't immediately after her initial vision loss, it was sometime later but it had been long enough that my daughter realized there were situations in which she didn't gain any meaningful information from trying to see the thing in front of her, so she stopped trying.
That was a long time ago. Over time, as her vision continued to decline, she tried to use her eyesight less and less. Initially, she could see things at very close proximity at just a few inches. Later on, even that vision was lost and today, while she can see some general forms (we think), we're not sure what she can really perceive other than sometimes she realizes she's about to run into something just before she does.
I don't typically post pictures here of my children. That's by intention. This has always been a blog about words, not images. Any pictures you have should be ones you form in your mind's eye based on the descriptions. When I started this blog, little did I know I'd have a blind child and that the written word would be more important to visualizing things to her than her eyes would be. Perhaps when she's older, she'll read through this blog and the lack of pictures will be a benefit.
The title of this post is, "Looking Blind" and in this case, I'm going to post a picture of my daughter, sitting on Santa's lap. This picture, to me, looks like the quintessential blind child, holding their cane in the standard way, wearing thick glasses and looking at nothing, while having an appearance of being attuned to the situation at the same time.
Several years ago, this wasn't my daughter. I would have been distraught to see her, my son or any child I know, looking in such a way. Today it's her reality though. She had a good time that night, I don't think being blind dampened her enjoyment at all.
The Big Boy Update: My son and his third-year classmates are cooking breakfast for the first- and second-year students on Friday morning. He needs to be at school an hour earlier than normal. My husband is going to help him with any cooking tips he might need beforehand. I don't know what they plan on making yet but he's excited about it.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: Today was red and green clothing day at school for my daughter's class. She decided to wear a dress and tights and looked so very lovely. She typically doesn't like to wear dresses but today, in the spirit of colors, she decided to forgo comfort and go for style.
I thought this couldn't be the case. Surely, we could do something—doctors could do something—to return her vision. This wasn't immediately after her initial vision loss, it was sometime later but it had been long enough that my daughter realized there were situations in which she didn't gain any meaningful information from trying to see the thing in front of her, so she stopped trying.
That was a long time ago. Over time, as her vision continued to decline, she tried to use her eyesight less and less. Initially, she could see things at very close proximity at just a few inches. Later on, even that vision was lost and today, while she can see some general forms (we think), we're not sure what she can really perceive other than sometimes she realizes she's about to run into something just before she does.
I don't typically post pictures here of my children. That's by intention. This has always been a blog about words, not images. Any pictures you have should be ones you form in your mind's eye based on the descriptions. When I started this blog, little did I know I'd have a blind child and that the written word would be more important to visualizing things to her than her eyes would be. Perhaps when she's older, she'll read through this blog and the lack of pictures will be a benefit.
The title of this post is, "Looking Blind" and in this case, I'm going to post a picture of my daughter, sitting on Santa's lap. This picture, to me, looks like the quintessential blind child, holding their cane in the standard way, wearing thick glasses and looking at nothing, while having an appearance of being attuned to the situation at the same time.
Several years ago, this wasn't my daughter. I would have been distraught to see her, my son or any child I know, looking in such a way. Today it's her reality though. She had a good time that night, I don't think being blind dampened her enjoyment at all.
The Big Boy Update: My son and his third-year classmates are cooking breakfast for the first- and second-year students on Friday morning. He needs to be at school an hour earlier than normal. My husband is going to help him with any cooking tips he might need beforehand. I don't know what they plan on making yet but he's excited about it.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: Today was red and green clothing day at school for my daughter's class. She decided to wear a dress and tights and looked so very lovely. She typically doesn't like to wear dresses but today, in the spirit of colors, she decided to forgo comfort and go for style.
Sunday, December 15, 2019
Amazon Bags
Every year for Christmas, we get a number of gifts from friends or family members from Amazon, where they have selected to have Amazon wrap the present before arrival. In recent years, Amazon has taken to delivering wrapped presents in these very sturdy drawstring bags in green, blue, grey, and red. They come in various rectangular sizes, with the largest being gusseted at the bottom to accommodate larger items. Here's one of their classic polka dot blue bags, of which I have many:
I selfishly use them only for family holiday gifts because I know I'll get to recollect them at the end of Christmas morning so I can use them again the following year. I don't like to let them wander off to places unknown, on account of I'm not likely to get them back. Amazon, by making such visually pleasing and reusable bags, is likely saving countless paper waste in wrapping paper every year. They're sturdy enough that they just look too nice to throw away and that, in and of itself, may be sufficient reason for people to keep them and reuse them.
They aren't holiday-specific although there is a nice red and green. Even those colors aren't typical holiday bright red and green but a more muted earth tone of each. This year at our friends' present swap, I was interested in presents people were giving and receiving, but I even admitted to everyone the thing that most caught my attention was the new color and pattern options of Amazon bags.
Today, I took some time to wrap, or in this case, package up, our family gifts for Christmas. I'm close to done, and I still have bags to spare. Typically we have a huge trash can full of wrapping paper and ribbon all balled up for recycling. I'm not sure how much of the holiday paper successfully makes it through the recycling process as most family's holiday wrapping is typically contaminated by ribbon, plastic and is in a plastic bag that doesn't meet the recycling waste requirements for this area.
Saving time and reducing paper waste, not to mention making opening packages easy for everyone: all wins for the holidays and planet Earth. Thanks, Amazon.
The Big Boy Update: My son has been chain watching Mark Rober today, leaving his videos up and playing even when he left the room to go do other things. He got sidetracked to another channel with two men who make all sorts of "hacks" (one of my son's favorite words). I'm not sure about the hacks channel, but they're making interesting things, they don't have an educational message behind it. For now, though, my son hasn't been complaining about YouTube. He's been successfully distracted from the video game-related channels he typically watches, that his father and I don't believe are the best use of his screen time. Mark Rober has great videos. Every time I walked through the room I'd get stuck watching how they solved a problem such as how to best skip a stone across a pond and what his nieces and nephews did to figure out the problem together.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter got hit by her brother several times today. He kicked her once too. Yes, he was physically violent to her, which we addressed, but she almost asked for it, pestering him and not leaving him alone, even when he told her multiple times to stop. She's delicate from an eye perspective, but she's tough in a lot of other ways.
They aren't holiday-specific although there is a nice red and green. Even those colors aren't typical holiday bright red and green but a more muted earth tone of each. This year at our friends' present swap, I was interested in presents people were giving and receiving, but I even admitted to everyone the thing that most caught my attention was the new color and pattern options of Amazon bags.
Today, I took some time to wrap, or in this case, package up, our family gifts for Christmas. I'm close to done, and I still have bags to spare. Typically we have a huge trash can full of wrapping paper and ribbon all balled up for recycling. I'm not sure how much of the holiday paper successfully makes it through the recycling process as most family's holiday wrapping is typically contaminated by ribbon, plastic and is in a plastic bag that doesn't meet the recycling waste requirements for this area.
Saving time and reducing paper waste, not to mention making opening packages easy for everyone: all wins for the holidays and planet Earth. Thanks, Amazon.
The Big Boy Update: My son has been chain watching Mark Rober today, leaving his videos up and playing even when he left the room to go do other things. He got sidetracked to another channel with two men who make all sorts of "hacks" (one of my son's favorite words). I'm not sure about the hacks channel, but they're making interesting things, they don't have an educational message behind it. For now, though, my son hasn't been complaining about YouTube. He's been successfully distracted from the video game-related channels he typically watches, that his father and I don't believe are the best use of his screen time. Mark Rober has great videos. Every time I walked through the room I'd get stuck watching how they solved a problem such as how to best skip a stone across a pond and what his nieces and nephews did to figure out the problem together.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter got hit by her brother several times today. He kicked her once too. Yes, he was physically violent to her, which we addressed, but she almost asked for it, pestering him and not leaving him alone, even when he told her multiple times to stop. She's delicate from an eye perspective, but she's tough in a lot of other ways.
Saturday, December 14, 2019
May You Please
My son and daughter were riding home with me tonight after having a special fondue dinner at my in-laws. My mother-in-law has, I think, perfected the at-home fondue meal. She made the cheese and broth completely from scratch and they rivaled, if not improved upon, what we've had at restaurants in the past.
My children participated minimally in the diner for different reasons: my daughter was tired and wanted to sleep and my son was too bouncy to be contained by a seat. Also, he wanted to bother his sister. Dinner went smoother in a way without the children at the table with us being able to have adult conversation which is something of a rarity here.
The children did come back to the table from time to time and were served various things coming out of the pot, with the steak being their favorite. During dinner we came up with a plan afterward: I would take the children home and my husband would stay there and watch the prior Star Wars movie to catch my in-laws up in preparation for the final installment coming out in a week's time.
My daughter had fallen asleep before we left so we loaded her, the dog and my son into the car and I had a chance to talk to my son alone for the ride. We talked about the Frozen II soundtrack and how I'd discovered there were outtake songs and instrumental tracks covering two discs, totaling far more music than the main songs we'd all been listening to on repeat for the past week.
While I was queueing up one of the outtake songs that didn't make it into the movie, my son asked the inevitable question: could he have screen time when we got home. And the more specific question of late: could he watch YouTube? We've not been letting him watch YouTube lately because his viewing choices haven't been that good. What he said to me was, "May you please let me watch YouTube when we get home?"
I told him no on the YouTube and that he needed to stop saying 'may you please' because he knew it was incorrect grammar. I was surprised by what he said next. He was genuinely distressed. He's been saying, "may you please" for years and I know we've corrected him before, but he swears he had no idea it was incorrect. The indignation and almost despair when he said, "Mom, are you telling me you and dad have just let me say that wrong for nine whole years now?"
I apologized and said I thought he was doing it intentionally, like some of the other things he says, because he prefers to. I gave him alternate things he could say that would be correct and how different variants had slightly different meanings. While I was saying this I was also thinking about the YouTube question.
I said if he wanted to watch three videos (and no more, period, don't even ask) we could watch Smarter Every Day or Mark Rober because they did science videos that were interesting. They both like to research and discover things and they do it in a way children can understand. He agreed.
We got home, I carried his sister to bed and he got into his pajamas and then he picked out three videos from the Smarter Every Day channel. The first one was figuring out how much force it would take to deform and then destroy a golf ball. The second one was on colliding vortex rings and the third one was on super laminar flow. My son was transfixed and I kept getting stuck standing in the living room while I was trying to get laundry started and things cleaned up because all three videos were really interesting. Tomorrow, I told him, if he wanted to watch that kind of YouTube, I could get behind it.
The Big Boy Update: My son can be a pest when he wants to play with someone. If his sister doesn't want to be bothered but he's bored, he'll bother her until she gets angry or cries. Tonight she just wanted to sleep, but he pestered her until she woke up and then they made some hot lava grid with Nana's blankets in her living room while we ate dinner. When she came in and asked why they'd put blankets on the floor my son said, "but you have the cleanest floors you say, Nana." She agreed, she did keep very clean floors.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter wanted to dress up like Elsa today. She came downstairs with a dress on and asked me if I could braid her hair like Elsa's. While I was doing her hair, she asked me if her dress was blue like Elsa's. I told her it was the dress she wore in Uncle Bob and Uncle Brian's wedding and it was blue, but it was dark blue but that it should count since it was blue, right? How do you explain shades to her? Actually, I think she understands because she used to be able to see. I don't know how you can possibly explain color intensity or colors at all even to a child born blind. I'm glad she had sight for the number of years she did.
My children participated minimally in the diner for different reasons: my daughter was tired and wanted to sleep and my son was too bouncy to be contained by a seat. Also, he wanted to bother his sister. Dinner went smoother in a way without the children at the table with us being able to have adult conversation which is something of a rarity here.
The children did come back to the table from time to time and were served various things coming out of the pot, with the steak being their favorite. During dinner we came up with a plan afterward: I would take the children home and my husband would stay there and watch the prior Star Wars movie to catch my in-laws up in preparation for the final installment coming out in a week's time.
My daughter had fallen asleep before we left so we loaded her, the dog and my son into the car and I had a chance to talk to my son alone for the ride. We talked about the Frozen II soundtrack and how I'd discovered there were outtake songs and instrumental tracks covering two discs, totaling far more music than the main songs we'd all been listening to on repeat for the past week.
While I was queueing up one of the outtake songs that didn't make it into the movie, my son asked the inevitable question: could he have screen time when we got home. And the more specific question of late: could he watch YouTube? We've not been letting him watch YouTube lately because his viewing choices haven't been that good. What he said to me was, "May you please let me watch YouTube when we get home?"
I told him no on the YouTube and that he needed to stop saying 'may you please' because he knew it was incorrect grammar. I was surprised by what he said next. He was genuinely distressed. He's been saying, "may you please" for years and I know we've corrected him before, but he swears he had no idea it was incorrect. The indignation and almost despair when he said, "Mom, are you telling me you and dad have just let me say that wrong for nine whole years now?"
I apologized and said I thought he was doing it intentionally, like some of the other things he says, because he prefers to. I gave him alternate things he could say that would be correct and how different variants had slightly different meanings. While I was saying this I was also thinking about the YouTube question.
I said if he wanted to watch three videos (and no more, period, don't even ask) we could watch Smarter Every Day or Mark Rober because they did science videos that were interesting. They both like to research and discover things and they do it in a way children can understand. He agreed.
We got home, I carried his sister to bed and he got into his pajamas and then he picked out three videos from the Smarter Every Day channel. The first one was figuring out how much force it would take to deform and then destroy a golf ball. The second one was on colliding vortex rings and the third one was on super laminar flow. My son was transfixed and I kept getting stuck standing in the living room while I was trying to get laundry started and things cleaned up because all three videos were really interesting. Tomorrow, I told him, if he wanted to watch that kind of YouTube, I could get behind it.
The Big Boy Update: My son can be a pest when he wants to play with someone. If his sister doesn't want to be bothered but he's bored, he'll bother her until she gets angry or cries. Tonight she just wanted to sleep, but he pestered her until she woke up and then they made some hot lava grid with Nana's blankets in her living room while we ate dinner. When she came in and asked why they'd put blankets on the floor my son said, "but you have the cleanest floors you say, Nana." She agreed, she did keep very clean floors.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter wanted to dress up like Elsa today. She came downstairs with a dress on and asked me if I could braid her hair like Elsa's. While I was doing her hair, she asked me if her dress was blue like Elsa's. I told her it was the dress she wore in Uncle Bob and Uncle Brian's wedding and it was blue, but it was dark blue but that it should count since it was blue, right? How do you explain shades to her? Actually, I think she understands because she used to be able to see. I don't know how you can possibly explain color intensity or colors at all even to a child born blind. I'm glad she had sight for the number of years she did.
Friday, December 13, 2019
Movie Night Present Swap
Every year we have a present swap with our friends that come to movie night. Some of the friends come regularly while others only come once per year because they have young children that make it hard to come due to the lateness of the hour for small children but on this one night, we all gather to share a night together and give small presents, usually from Amazon wish lists, but not always. It's a fun evening and one we always look forward to.
This year we were hosting and it occurred to me yesterday morning we'd better start getting ready for tonight. We had not a single decoration up in our house, no tree and not one present wrapped. There was an additional problem in that I thought it was Wednesday instead of Thursday, meaning we had even less time to get ready.
I enlisted the help of our sitter who, for two days, helped me transform the house and get everything wrapped just in time for this evening. My husband made a taco dinner for my son as a belated birthday dinner. My son and daughter helped put decorations on the tree and then my daughter helped put the presents under our tree.
People arrived and the children, my children, were practically manic, ready to have presents handed out while the last of the friends arrived. I brought the dog's place cot down and had her stay in the room, on place, with everyone around. Typically, she's be under the bed, avoiding everyone, but I'm working on this based on some suggestions from her trainer. I had her lay on her cot in the middle of a hectic room and she stayed calm. People came over and petted her and she stayed calm. Later, I released her and she got up, took a few steps away but instead of leaving the room she came back and elected to stay there and be around everyone. I was impressed, she made a lot of progress in one hour tonight.
After we swapped presents we came upstairs to sing happy birthday to my son and eat some ice cream cake my husband had gotten for him. My son was a little upset because he said he didn't like surprises. I think he enjoyed the attention though.
I'm now in my room, having kicked my children out, saying it was my time of night and I needed some time for me. This was fine for my son who only wanted to do things on a screened device. My daughter was a little less happy about it as she likes to be entertained at all times. I've sent her off to listen to an audiobook, movie or story on Alexa. I also told her she could read. She's starting to like to read more and more.
The Big Boy Update: My son is so energetic. I use the word 'manic' because that's what it seems like to me. He doesn't seem in control; like his brain and body are running at full tilt and he's not able to think or stop himself from bounding around and bouncing off things. I don't know if I was like this as a child; I suspect I was.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter enjoyed hanging ornaments today. I picked out ones that were very tactile and obvious in shape. Ornaments are great for a blind child because there is such variety and many of them feel like the things they are: angel, nutcracker, gingerbread man, reindeer, etc.
This year we were hosting and it occurred to me yesterday morning we'd better start getting ready for tonight. We had not a single decoration up in our house, no tree and not one present wrapped. There was an additional problem in that I thought it was Wednesday instead of Thursday, meaning we had even less time to get ready.
I enlisted the help of our sitter who, for two days, helped me transform the house and get everything wrapped just in time for this evening. My husband made a taco dinner for my son as a belated birthday dinner. My son and daughter helped put decorations on the tree and then my daughter helped put the presents under our tree.
People arrived and the children, my children, were practically manic, ready to have presents handed out while the last of the friends arrived. I brought the dog's place cot down and had her stay in the room, on place, with everyone around. Typically, she's be under the bed, avoiding everyone, but I'm working on this based on some suggestions from her trainer. I had her lay on her cot in the middle of a hectic room and she stayed calm. People came over and petted her and she stayed calm. Later, I released her and she got up, took a few steps away but instead of leaving the room she came back and elected to stay there and be around everyone. I was impressed, she made a lot of progress in one hour tonight.
After we swapped presents we came upstairs to sing happy birthday to my son and eat some ice cream cake my husband had gotten for him. My son was a little upset because he said he didn't like surprises. I think he enjoyed the attention though.
I'm now in my room, having kicked my children out, saying it was my time of night and I needed some time for me. This was fine for my son who only wanted to do things on a screened device. My daughter was a little less happy about it as she likes to be entertained at all times. I've sent her off to listen to an audiobook, movie or story on Alexa. I also told her she could read. She's starting to like to read more and more.
The Big Boy Update: My son is so energetic. I use the word 'manic' because that's what it seems like to me. He doesn't seem in control; like his brain and body are running at full tilt and he's not able to think or stop himself from bounding around and bouncing off things. I don't know if I was like this as a child; I suspect I was.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter enjoyed hanging ornaments today. I picked out ones that were very tactile and obvious in shape. Ornaments are great for a blind child because there is such variety and many of them feel like the things they are: angel, nutcracker, gingerbread man, reindeer, etc.
Thursday, December 12, 2019
Holiday Help
You would think moving out of our house for a week wouldn't take that long to move back in from, but every time I think I'm done more shows up that needs to be done. Today we had another thing happening at the house: the delivery of the cabinet doors and drawers from the kitchen and master bathroom. We had some of them refinished that had sustained wear and damage.
I wouldn't have thought this would be much of an impact on the drawers and cabinet contents, but in that respect, I was wrong. To remove the drawer facings, they had to remove content that blocked their ability to get to the attachment hinges and screws. We had separators in a lot of the drawers and with their removal, the contents now need to be sorted back into their spaces. This brought to my attention the nine years of debris that had snuck down between the areas of the separators. Everything will be nice and clean when it's done, but it's going to take a bit to get all the drawers cleaned and put back together.
The workers took things out of drawers and cabinets that were in the way and put them here and there. When they were done today I had a collection of things that I wasn't altogether sure where to put. It's interesting how you don't realize the stuff you have until it's all spread out in front of you and then you wonder what you were keeping that thing for or, wow, I didn't even remember I had that. Or even, "Hey, I thought I lost that thing!"
There's a lot to finish tidying up in the kitchen and master bath, but the good news is the cabinets look very nice. I'm glad we got them done. I will miss the mars in the kitchen cabinets all at the same height, where my children banged into them with the glider they both spent a lot of time in when they were babies.
And then there's Christmas. Gah! We have a friend's present swap here at our house tomorrow night and I had not a single decoration up, save for my daughter's heavily laden tree outside. In the hope to get some things done today, I messaged my children's sitter to see if she would be up for some decorating help. She came over and saved the day. She worked with me and at this point tonight, I'm tired, but my part of the holiday decorating is pretty much done.
My husband is getting a tree tomorrow and when the children get home they'll put on the ornaments. We missed out the window to get a tree together as a family this year, but we can do that next year. Presents. Presents! Fortunately, I'd ordered and had most of our presents here at the house before we moved out. Only nothing is wrapped. Morgan, our sitter, to the rescue again because tomorrow she's coming over to help me get it all wrapped up in time for the party tomorrow night.
I'm going to have a nice long nap, just like Santa does, once Christmas is over.
The Big Boy Update: My son's birthday was yesterday but we joined him in his class today to share lunch with them today. We brought cookies for the students for dessert and then my son presented his class with two books, one of the planets and the other one about space and the space missions and satellites. The students all wanted to look at the books when we opened them up. I wanted to look at them too, they had some beautiful pictures and diagrams. My son loves space and the planets.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter's teacher called today after school. She thought a call would be better than an email. My daughter is having troubles again with attitude. Specifically, she's being very direct and unkind to her VI friend. She has a preferred friend, so preferred they should probably be separated, but that doesn't mean she should be rude and dismissive of other friends. She's burning bridges and hurting feelings. Her teacher and I talked about what she was planning to do to address it, which I agreed with, and I talked about how we would try to support at home modelling better wording with friends.
I wouldn't have thought this would be much of an impact on the drawers and cabinet contents, but in that respect, I was wrong. To remove the drawer facings, they had to remove content that blocked their ability to get to the attachment hinges and screws. We had separators in a lot of the drawers and with their removal, the contents now need to be sorted back into their spaces. This brought to my attention the nine years of debris that had snuck down between the areas of the separators. Everything will be nice and clean when it's done, but it's going to take a bit to get all the drawers cleaned and put back together.
The workers took things out of drawers and cabinets that were in the way and put them here and there. When they were done today I had a collection of things that I wasn't altogether sure where to put. It's interesting how you don't realize the stuff you have until it's all spread out in front of you and then you wonder what you were keeping that thing for or, wow, I didn't even remember I had that. Or even, "Hey, I thought I lost that thing!"
There's a lot to finish tidying up in the kitchen and master bath, but the good news is the cabinets look very nice. I'm glad we got them done. I will miss the mars in the kitchen cabinets all at the same height, where my children banged into them with the glider they both spent a lot of time in when they were babies.
And then there's Christmas. Gah! We have a friend's present swap here at our house tomorrow night and I had not a single decoration up, save for my daughter's heavily laden tree outside. In the hope to get some things done today, I messaged my children's sitter to see if she would be up for some decorating help. She came over and saved the day. She worked with me and at this point tonight, I'm tired, but my part of the holiday decorating is pretty much done.
My husband is getting a tree tomorrow and when the children get home they'll put on the ornaments. We missed out the window to get a tree together as a family this year, but we can do that next year. Presents. Presents! Fortunately, I'd ordered and had most of our presents here at the house before we moved out. Only nothing is wrapped. Morgan, our sitter, to the rescue again because tomorrow she's coming over to help me get it all wrapped up in time for the party tomorrow night.
I'm going to have a nice long nap, just like Santa does, once Christmas is over.
The Big Boy Update: My son's birthday was yesterday but we joined him in his class today to share lunch with them today. We brought cookies for the students for dessert and then my son presented his class with two books, one of the planets and the other one about space and the space missions and satellites. The students all wanted to look at the books when we opened them up. I wanted to look at them too, they had some beautiful pictures and diagrams. My son loves space and the planets.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter's teacher called today after school. She thought a call would be better than an email. My daughter is having troubles again with attitude. Specifically, she's being very direct and unkind to her VI friend. She has a preferred friend, so preferred they should probably be separated, but that doesn't mean she should be rude and dismissive of other friends. She's burning bridges and hurting feelings. Her teacher and I talked about what she was planning to do to address it, which I agreed with, and I talked about how we would try to support at home modelling better wording with friends.
Wednesday, December 11, 2019
The Pilgrim Village
I've talked a lot about my daughter's teachers and how we're so grateful for what they do to help her be successful in the integrated school she attends. By integrated, what I mean is she attends a standard year-round public school in our district. Two schools in our county provide additional support for vision-impaired children. Each child is assigned typically to the school closest in proximity to where they live. We're about equidistant to both of the VI program schools, which is why my daughter's cab ride is so long—she's going half-way across the county to get to and from school each day.
My daughter's school is full of sighted children. It's a large elementary school serving grades K-5. At any given time, there are a handful of visually impaired students. Out of the hundreds that attend, there are somewhere from five to eight VI students at any given time. I've said to a lot of people, "there just aren't that many blind children" (thankfully).
By attending an integrated school, my daughter learns the same things her sighted peers learn. She's going through school doing everything everyone else is doing around her, only her teachers are making sure she has the materials in a format she can consume. My daughter will spend her life surrounded by sighted people, and this integration is a good thing for her in many ways. But providing my daughter with materials she can use her fingers to understand, takes work.
In comes one of our favorite teachers, Ms. B, who is my daughter's Braillist. Ms. B is with my daughter throughout the day and is there to help when she needs it and to not be there when my daughter doesn't need help or is expected to figure things out on her own. That's a fine line, and one all parents have as well. No smothering, no doing it for the child, but being there when there is a need.
Ms. B. has a lot of work to do while the class is doing their daily educational activities. She's translating books for my daughter to read and preparing materials for her that the class will be doing in the coming days and weeks. Recently, the students did a unit on Pilgrims. They had lots to read and questions to write about what they'd read. For example, here's a map of how a typical Pilgrim village might be laid out:
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter talks to my mother on her long cab ride home many days. Recently, my mother asked her what she had done in school that day. My daughter answered, "Let me go back in my mind a little bit to think about what I did."
My daughter's school is full of sighted children. It's a large elementary school serving grades K-5. At any given time, there are a handful of visually impaired students. Out of the hundreds that attend, there are somewhere from five to eight VI students at any given time. I've said to a lot of people, "there just aren't that many blind children" (thankfully).
By attending an integrated school, my daughter learns the same things her sighted peers learn. She's going through school doing everything everyone else is doing around her, only her teachers are making sure she has the materials in a format she can consume. My daughter will spend her life surrounded by sighted people, and this integration is a good thing for her in many ways. But providing my daughter with materials she can use her fingers to understand, takes work.
In comes one of our favorite teachers, Ms. B, who is my daughter's Braillist. Ms. B is with my daughter throughout the day and is there to help when she needs it and to not be there when my daughter doesn't need help or is expected to figure things out on her own. That's a fine line, and one all parents have as well. No smothering, no doing it for the child, but being there when there is a need.
Ms. B. has a lot of work to do while the class is doing their daily educational activities. She's translating books for my daughter to read and preparing materials for her that the class will be doing in the coming days and weeks. Recently, the students did a unit on Pilgrims. They had lots to read and questions to write about what they'd read. For example, here's a map of how a typical Pilgrim village might be laid out:
My daughter can't see that page, so Ms. B made her a map and a key. I posted something like this before, but it's such a good example of how my daughter can be successful if given the information in the right format. I think it bears repeating.
Here's the map, followed by the key. Here are some things to note about what's on the pages that aren't listed for the sighted children, because they can see the detail in the picture and understand things easily on the map. The white area is foam and is raised, so the family farm areas are obvious. Next, she added black tape for the fences. There are no trees or people in my daughter's map because they're not germane to the questions. The green rectangles are a tactile sticker that feels a bit like sandpaper. Ms. B. has a lot of options for things like the green sandpaper, yellow corrugated cardboard and purple felt she can use that will be discernable to my daughter. For us, the green means garden, to my daughter, the rough area means gardens.
My daughter probably took ten minutes to complete the worksheet and thought nothing about the work it took to help her be just as successful as the other students in her class could be with a single, mass-produced sheet of printed paper. I love all the things Ms. B. makes just for my daughter. I recycle a lot, but some things, like this one, I keep so I can show people how a blind child can learn just as well as a sighted child can if given the chance.
The Big Boy Update: My son is nine-years-old today. He woke up early, got dressed, and got everything ready for school in the hopes we'd allow him to watch Teen Titans Go on the Alexa Show while he ate breakfast. It was his birthday, how could we say no?
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter talks to my mother on her long cab ride home many days. Recently, my mother asked her what she had done in school that day. My daughter answered, "Let me go back in my mind a little bit to think about what I did."
Tuesday, December 10, 2019
Self Determination
I learned a new term today, "Self Determination". My husband and I attend once each year an IEP or Individualized Education Plan meeting for my daughter. During this meeting, all of my daughter's teachers present to us their educational goals for my daughter for the next twelve months. The meeting could, by format, be very dry, and yet it's one of my favorite meetings of the year.
I hear many IEP meetings are difficult both on the parents and on the educators presenting the plan. This could be because the parents have expectations for their child that differ from those of the education team or maybe they don't believe the IEP fully meets the particular needs of their child. For whatever the reasons may be, some meetings are long, arduous, contentious and downright not fun. In our case, it's the exact opposite.
We love our teachers. They have worked to prepare the appropriate goals for our daughter that will be both challenging and yet attainable. They truly want to help her learn as much as she can. It's evident in all they do. The IEP process on their side is highly specific, complex and done in such a way that it is both legally binding and protects both the parents and the school's rights. When the child is old enough to attend, they are invited to the meeting as well.
For us, it's more of a formality, although a very important one. My husband and I have read the proposed goals and accommodations ahead of time and discussed a few things here and there, but for the most part, and here's the thing that I try to tell people, we don't know what my daughter needs to know. I mean think about children who don't have a need for a specialized plan to address their special needs. I'll compare with my son. I trust that his teachers are following an educational path to give my son everything he needs to move forward each year and that they're thinking of his overall education in the process.
We don't have a meeting and argue about how it's done, we just trust that the teachers are doing their jobs. It's that way with my daughter, only more so. In her case, I had no idea that in order to effectively find the handle or doorknob on a door, there is a way to use your cane in such a way that you can sweep and find it much more quickly than you could do so with your hands when you've found a wall, expect there to be a door there somewhere but don't know where the handle is.
What about if you've dropped something and are wanting to find it on the ground. Do you stick your hands down on the ground and feel around, possibly getting your hand in some muck or something sharp? You'll only do that once before you start to use your cane to search. These are two items my daughter's Orientation and Mobility teacher mentioned today when we were talking about something after the meeting. These are the things we don't know we need to know, or more accurately, that my daughter needs to know. Her teachers know what she needs to learn to be successful not only in doing math calculations but in navigating her world.
We heard the term, "self determination" today and they told us this is the new version of, "self-advocacy". I asked my daughter if she'd heard the phrase tonight when she was high up in the tree outside, hanging Christmas balls. She hadn't yet but she said, "I know what it means to self-advocate." I told her she was spot on that it meant just that, only it was newer and fancier and she would hear more soon I was sure.
Today our meeting went quickly. We had a good time swapping stories with our teachers and talking about what a relief it was to all of us that my daughter was back to being happy and excited about school, instead of angry and crying about everything. We're grateful every day for our teachers and I know my daughter is, too.
Who My Son Punched Today: My son punched Madison in the chest tonight—because he wanted the house to be quiet and didn't want anyone to come in. This did not go well for him. Then, after Madison was in the bedroom with my daughter for five minutes, she came out crying and had fell and hurt herself. I was about to walk her home when my son came out from the bonus room and said in a nasty, accusatory voice, "it's not MY fault." So he lost a privilege on the spot and when I got home, I laid into him about his attitude and said he was being a bully. This enraged him. He is a really nice child until he's not, and then he's just downright mean and only about what's in it for him. My husband thought I was a little too harsh I think, but I believe he needs to think before saying and doing things. He needs some anger management and impulse control and I'm not going to let him get away with bad behavior under any circumstances. We ended the night on a good note, but for a while, it was rough going.
What My Daughter Said Today: My daughter hung more large Christmas balls in her tree in the front yard tonight. It was dark, but that matters not to her. I got a step stool and handed them to her. From standing back I thought the tree was really looking up but I told her I might want more balls. She said, "Mom, we're in the forties, don't complain." We went inside for dinner. My husband had served up my daughter's plate and she started to eat. After a few minutes, she said, "Daddy, I'm not trying to say your fries are bad, but they're not really good this time." He agreed, he'd overcooked them accidentally.
I hear many IEP meetings are difficult both on the parents and on the educators presenting the plan. This could be because the parents have expectations for their child that differ from those of the education team or maybe they don't believe the IEP fully meets the particular needs of their child. For whatever the reasons may be, some meetings are long, arduous, contentious and downright not fun. In our case, it's the exact opposite.
We love our teachers. They have worked to prepare the appropriate goals for our daughter that will be both challenging and yet attainable. They truly want to help her learn as much as she can. It's evident in all they do. The IEP process on their side is highly specific, complex and done in such a way that it is both legally binding and protects both the parents and the school's rights. When the child is old enough to attend, they are invited to the meeting as well.
For us, it's more of a formality, although a very important one. My husband and I have read the proposed goals and accommodations ahead of time and discussed a few things here and there, but for the most part, and here's the thing that I try to tell people, we don't know what my daughter needs to know. I mean think about children who don't have a need for a specialized plan to address their special needs. I'll compare with my son. I trust that his teachers are following an educational path to give my son everything he needs to move forward each year and that they're thinking of his overall education in the process.
We don't have a meeting and argue about how it's done, we just trust that the teachers are doing their jobs. It's that way with my daughter, only more so. In her case, I had no idea that in order to effectively find the handle or doorknob on a door, there is a way to use your cane in such a way that you can sweep and find it much more quickly than you could do so with your hands when you've found a wall, expect there to be a door there somewhere but don't know where the handle is.
What about if you've dropped something and are wanting to find it on the ground. Do you stick your hands down on the ground and feel around, possibly getting your hand in some muck or something sharp? You'll only do that once before you start to use your cane to search. These are two items my daughter's Orientation and Mobility teacher mentioned today when we were talking about something after the meeting. These are the things we don't know we need to know, or more accurately, that my daughter needs to know. Her teachers know what she needs to learn to be successful not only in doing math calculations but in navigating her world.
We heard the term, "self determination" today and they told us this is the new version of, "self-advocacy". I asked my daughter if she'd heard the phrase tonight when she was high up in the tree outside, hanging Christmas balls. She hadn't yet but she said, "I know what it means to self-advocate." I told her she was spot on that it meant just that, only it was newer and fancier and she would hear more soon I was sure.
Today our meeting went quickly. We had a good time swapping stories with our teachers and talking about what a relief it was to all of us that my daughter was back to being happy and excited about school, instead of angry and crying about everything. We're grateful every day for our teachers and I know my daughter is, too.
Who My Son Punched Today: My son punched Madison in the chest tonight—because he wanted the house to be quiet and didn't want anyone to come in. This did not go well for him. Then, after Madison was in the bedroom with my daughter for five minutes, she came out crying and had fell and hurt herself. I was about to walk her home when my son came out from the bonus room and said in a nasty, accusatory voice, "it's not MY fault." So he lost a privilege on the spot and when I got home, I laid into him about his attitude and said he was being a bully. This enraged him. He is a really nice child until he's not, and then he's just downright mean and only about what's in it for him. My husband thought I was a little too harsh I think, but I believe he needs to think before saying and doing things. He needs some anger management and impulse control and I'm not going to let him get away with bad behavior under any circumstances. We ended the night on a good note, but for a while, it was rough going.
What My Daughter Said Today: My daughter hung more large Christmas balls in her tree in the front yard tonight. It was dark, but that matters not to her. I got a step stool and handed them to her. From standing back I thought the tree was really looking up but I told her I might want more balls. She said, "Mom, we're in the forties, don't complain." We went inside for dinner. My husband had served up my daughter's plate and she started to eat. After a few minutes, she said, "Daddy, I'm not trying to say your fries are bad, but they're not really good this time." He agreed, he'd overcooked them accidentally.
Monday, December 9, 2019
On No, The Cabinet Doors!
The full family is home today, including the dog, after staying with my in-laws for a week while the hardwoods were worked on in our home. Each of the family members had a different response to the change that in some cases I could have predicted but in other cases, I couldn't have.
My son was the one person I would have bet money on was my son. He just doesn't like change. when he came in today he was already preparing to mourn the loss of the carpet in our master. In fact, on the way home from school when I was telling him what to expect when he walked in the house, he told me we needed to get a green rug for the master—in the same color green as our prior carpet—and have it about room-sized in dimensions. We should get that now and have it put down in our master straight away.
And although he didn't like the room initially, it grew on him by the end of the day and he even found a positive aspect when he got swish on the floor. He's not allowed to swish in the bedroom for that very reason, but when it happened tonight we just wiped it up—and told him he still wasn't allowed to swish in the bedroom even if Uncle Jonathan had come over and he wanted to impress him.
My daughter wasn't overly into or against the hardwoods aside from being interested in how room transitions were more difficult for her to determine since there wasn't the change of material under her feet. What was interesting with her was her immediate noticing of something I didn't expect. She came in the door and on the way to put her backpack up she said, "Oh no! The cabinet doors are missing!" She had realized the first one was gone and before I could say anything she'd moved to the drawers above and then the next cabinet over.
This, I thought, was a seeing thing and yet my son hadn't even remarked on it. I told my daughter the cabinet doors and drawer facings from some of the kitchen and bathroom cabinets had been taken by a company to do repairs. She felt along down the row of cabinets, checking what had been sent away.
My husband had a nice response, saying, "it looks like they've always been here" when he saw the master finished for the first time. I agree. It has an interestingly different feel in the room that's somehow warmer while being cooler feeling from an atmosphere perspective.
The dog I'm a bit surprised about. She doesn't take to change well, but I thought she'd like having nice cool floors under the bed where she likes to lie. She went straight upstairs and hid under my daughter's bed. There is still some smell, so it could be that. Tonight she's on the bed with me, which she never does for more than a few minutes. She might be the biggest holdout in the family when it comes to the new floors.
What My Son Said Tonight: My son wanted to play four square with us tonight. A few minutes he found me in the closet and said, "Do you want to know a fact?" I told him I most definitely did. He said, "One hundred percent of people who are my dad has absolutely no control over their phones." I think he couldn't distract my husband away from his phone to play ball. I laughed so much when he said it though, I told him to go straight to dad and tell him exactly what he told me. My husband can definitely get lost in his phone.
Who My Daughter Read To Today: Uncle Jonathan came over to help move some furniture today and decided to stay for dinner. I asked him if he was available to be read to by my daughter for her homework (read to an adult for fifteen minutes every day). My daughter was all up for someone else listening to her read. It also gives you a chance to see her read braille close up and watch her fingers track across the page and how she keeps her place from line to line. She's getting faster and faster and her reading is beginning to be predictive and have appropriate and interesting intonation.
My son was the one person I would have bet money on was my son. He just doesn't like change. when he came in today he was already preparing to mourn the loss of the carpet in our master. In fact, on the way home from school when I was telling him what to expect when he walked in the house, he told me we needed to get a green rug for the master—in the same color green as our prior carpet—and have it about room-sized in dimensions. We should get that now and have it put down in our master straight away.
And although he didn't like the room initially, it grew on him by the end of the day and he even found a positive aspect when he got swish on the floor. He's not allowed to swish in the bedroom for that very reason, but when it happened tonight we just wiped it up—and told him he still wasn't allowed to swish in the bedroom even if Uncle Jonathan had come over and he wanted to impress him.
My daughter wasn't overly into or against the hardwoods aside from being interested in how room transitions were more difficult for her to determine since there wasn't the change of material under her feet. What was interesting with her was her immediate noticing of something I didn't expect. She came in the door and on the way to put her backpack up she said, "Oh no! The cabinet doors are missing!" She had realized the first one was gone and before I could say anything she'd moved to the drawers above and then the next cabinet over.
This, I thought, was a seeing thing and yet my son hadn't even remarked on it. I told my daughter the cabinet doors and drawer facings from some of the kitchen and bathroom cabinets had been taken by a company to do repairs. She felt along down the row of cabinets, checking what had been sent away.
My husband had a nice response, saying, "it looks like they've always been here" when he saw the master finished for the first time. I agree. It has an interestingly different feel in the room that's somehow warmer while being cooler feeling from an atmosphere perspective.
The dog I'm a bit surprised about. She doesn't take to change well, but I thought she'd like having nice cool floors under the bed where she likes to lie. She went straight upstairs and hid under my daughter's bed. There is still some smell, so it could be that. Tonight she's on the bed with me, which she never does for more than a few minutes. She might be the biggest holdout in the family when it comes to the new floors.
What My Son Said Tonight: My son wanted to play four square with us tonight. A few minutes he found me in the closet and said, "Do you want to know a fact?" I told him I most definitely did. He said, "One hundred percent of people who are my dad has absolutely no control over their phones." I think he couldn't distract my husband away from his phone to play ball. I laughed so much when he said it though, I told him to go straight to dad and tell him exactly what he told me. My husband can definitely get lost in his phone.
Who My Daughter Read To Today: Uncle Jonathan came over to help move some furniture today and decided to stay for dinner. I asked him if he was available to be read to by my daughter for her homework (read to an adult for fifteen minutes every day). My daughter was all up for someone else listening to her read. It also gives you a chance to see her read braille close up and watch her fingers track across the page and how she keeps her place from line to line. She's getting faster and faster and her reading is beginning to be predictive and have appropriate and interesting intonation.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)