Saturday, August 18, 2012

Conversation Stalkers

Your friend is over visiting.  Maybe it's with a group of friends who have come over or at a general social event.  You notice your friend is sort of following you around.  You get your meal and sit down at a casual event and your friend brings their meal over and sits with you.  But you're engaged in a conversation with someone else at that point.  You finish your meal and move into cleaning up the dishes from dinner mode.  Your friend follows you into the kitchen to help.  Then it dawns on you.

Your friend has something he or she wants to tell you.  They've been following you around for a bit, feeling a little like a social attachment, because they've got something to discuss and they're trying to figure out a way to either get you to stop rambling on—something I can do for hours—or they're trying to get up the nerve to talk about the subject.

I don't conversation stalk people.  Mostly because I'll just bust into the house and without hesitation start to blurt out the extremely important, can't possibly wait until you finish what you're doing, earth shattering, mundane little story that wasn't that exciting but I just had to tell it, stat.

I'm not conversationally shy or chat-patient.  But I have friends who are.  Usually, when I realize the person has something to say, and they've been hanging out, patiently, for an opportunity to start a discussion, I feel like I should have been more sensitive or I should have picked up on it sooner.  Sometimes, I even know what the topic is about; maybe their father has been diagnosed with cancer and they have an update that's difficult to talk about.

Either way, I try to be a good friend and be a better listener than I would have otherwise been.  If I have an idea of the topic, I'll even ask a leading question in the hopes that by bringing it up, the person can more easily talk about it.  I try to be there for people.  It's something I need to keep working on—my listening skills.

The Big Boy Update:  "Daddy's Car."  Mommy loves her car.  Her car that she doesn't drive nearly as much as she used to because she gets to drive daddy's minivan to haul children around while he drives her BMW and shows houses to clients.  My son likes to open the garage door and look to see if daddy is home so he knows cars come and go and we come and go with them.  When we got in from lunch today, he walked over to my car, patted it and said, "Daddy's car."  Arrugh.  No.  No no no no no.  Mommy's car, not daddy's car.  Can you say, "mommy's car?"  <blank stare>   Sigh.

The Tiny Girl Chronicles:  Happy Angry.  She has been polar opposites baby today.  The sinus infection/snot infestation has her frustrated because she can't breath well and that impedes eating and pacifiering.  Also, she has an external yeast infection that's presented as a diaper rash.  Antibiotics for the sinus infection make the yeast infection worse.  And the infection medication makes her have diarrhea.  She's very happy—because by nature she's just a happy baby—and then she ruins her pants and gets all stingy, or she can't eat because she's congested.  Or we're using the nasal aspirator on her which makes her madder than anything.  Other than the volcano fire anger spikes though, she seems to be managing well.

Fitness Update:  Manicure or Run?  Ooo, this one is an easy one.  But it shows how our priorities change over time.  Six months ago if you told me I had two hours to do what I wanted, manicure would have been on the top of my list of things to do for, "me."  But now, given the opportunity to run or go get my nails done—nails that desperately need grooming—then I pick run.  Hands down.  Easy decision.

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