Twelve Years

I’m a little in shock right now.   One of our friends has been in court for the last several days.   We found out about it last night when his brother-in-law, one of our closest friends, called to ask if we could come sit in the courtroom as a sign of support for closing arguments this morning.   My husband went and I stayed at home with the children.

The charge was rape, but the situation wasn’t straightforward.   Three-and-a-half years ago our friend was at a party.   There was alcohol, there was marijuana, and there was partying.   Our friend stayed over that night and had sex with someone who lived there.   He says everything about it was consensual.

The girl had broken up with her boyfriend that day or the day before.  The boyfriend was in the house during the party and that night.  The next day though she suddenly says she’s been raped.   Our friend contends it was to save face with her boyfriend, which she had made up with.   A rape kit was taken and yes, they had had sex.   All sorts of legal things followed, which led up to today.

My husband heard some of the details from today and the entire situation seemed to be two people in a room, having sex, with breaks in which she could have gotten up and left the room easily.   She wasn’t being threatened or treated aggressively.   There were text chains before and afterwards, some deleted later on her side but kept on our friend’s phone that were shown in his defense.

I could go on, but since I wasn’t there I don’t really know.    If, what our friend says is true: that the girl said she was raped to save face with her boyfriend, then that lie started a chain of events which  culminated today with our friend being found guilty and sentenced to twelve years in prison.

Was it a lie that was too difficult to get out of once started?   There are too many components of the trial running through my mind that make no sense if she was a victim.   If she was raped, then today she got justice.   If she wasn’t, she has to live with knowing she sent a young, innocent man to jail.

I believe my friend.

The Big Boy Update:  My son has anxiety issues, Dhruti told me today.   This, I knew, but she said it’s something we need to work on.   He worries about something bad happening in a movie, show or even book so much he doesn’t want to keep watching/reading to find out what happens next.    Dhruti says we can help him work with this kind of anxiety with some strategies.

The Tiny Girl Chronicles:  My daughter told our sitter while at the pool this morning she’d like to go to lifeguard class so she could “be the littlest life guard to ever exist”.