The Most Drops

 My daughter drops things.   She runs into things.   She can't see that the things on the desk are there or table or bed or floor even and things get knocked off or over all the time.   She will learn skills as she gets older on how to place things in such a way as to know where they are to protect her from knocking her own items over.   

That doesn't work when you're somewhere where you didn't place the things around, like sitting down to eat a meal at a location where the food has been set by someone else.  She's learned to be careful, because it's no fun knocking over your glass of milk because you didn't know it was there and you moved too quickly.  She very proprioceptive and is also quite careful, but she's also eight-years-old and likes to move quickly. 

For instance this evening she was working on a math assessment she didn't get to do during school because she and her brother had dentist appointments at the end of the school day.  She got up from the desk three times and each time she walked into the chair from the other desk that had been moved over to sit by her during the day.   Did she move the chair out of the way so she wouldn't run into it again?   Not until I suggested she did.  She didn't run into the chair hard, but it had to hurt to some degree.   She never complains unless she's really hurt, usually involving her head.  She's tough. 

My daughter knocks things over and runs into things.  But I have the most drops.   I drop things all the time—and I do mean all the time.  Yesterday I think I had dropped at least fourteen things and I didn't start counting at the beginning of the day.   Sometimes, after dropping something, I'll drop it again as I'm picking it up.   There is a reason for this, or I suspect two reasons, but one reason I'm going to either give credit to or place blame upon. 

I don't have full feeling in my hands.   I have a spinal cord injury and at this point I've had several surgeries to help things.   And while things improved rather dramatically after my nerves had healed, there was additional damage done during one of the surgeries due to the large amount of scar tissue I have in my neck in the area the doctor was working.  Most of what happened in that surgery has returned to the function I had before, but I remain with hands that just can't discern things tactually like they used to. 

That's part of the problem and perhaps the largest contender in why I drop so many things.   The problem is compounded three-fold.   First, I'm always in a hurry.  Second, I try to carry more than I should.  And third—and this is the most damning one—I seem to think I can feel things normally. 

Why it is after fifteen years I don't remember I need to take more care, pay more attention to and grasp more firmly to things, I don't understand.   Not everything I drop is a result of misjudging my grasp because when you've stacked things too high just because you don't want to make two trips to the attic and then something drops, it's the fault of the arms and ultimately brain that cause the drops. 

It got me thinking about the phrase, "I'm clumsy," which I've used to describe myself for years.  Other people see themselves as clumsy without have a neurological deficiency in their hands.   Does that mean they're rushing, not paying attention, and/or carrying too many things at once?  I'm not sure how a person can qualify for the label 'Clumsy' without having one or more of those characteristics.   

Fortunately, I have them all, so I definitely qualify for what I would say is clumsy.   Did I say fortunately?

The Big Boy Update:  My son has been showing both signs of maturity and impulse control, responding politely and immediately to requests from us as well as outright uncontrolled rage in the form of yelling at us for the slightest and unknown frustration from us.   He's moving in the right direction.  Less than two weeks at school and the upperclassmen and same-grade peers in his classroom are making a difference in how he behaves.   I think it's a combination of age as well as positive role models from school.   I like to tell him I'm proud of him when he does something positive or mature, but he hates when i do that so I'm looking for words that intimate the same thing without directly saying so, sneaking in the positivity any way I can

The Tiny Girl Chronicles:  My son, daughter, Rayan, and Keira were on the playset and swings late this afternoon.   The dog always wants to be out with them, but ever since our new neighbors moved in, the dog wants to go look for him so I have to leash her outside.   I went out and was hooking up the dog when I heard my daughter say to Keira about the game the boys were predominately in charge of creating, "This is boring.   It's all about killing."  Then, before Keira could respond, my daughter added, "well, I like the killing part."  Keira, ever the negotiator, said to her, "we could always suggest another game."  I wonder if they suggested one with less killing?