We knew Lucy’s heart was in danger of failing at any point. We knew the five medications we had her on were prolonging her heart while damaging her kidneys in the process. We were giving her pain medication to help make her comfortable. But when your heart has grown out of proportion and you can’t breath because your chest cavity is filled with your heart, there isn’t much to be done other than make the best choice about when it’s time to put her to sleep.
My mother-in-law called us this morning saying Lucy had taken a turn for the worse, rather quickly, and had a very bad night. She had called our veterinarian and made an appointment for this afternoon to get their advice on her condition. While we were in the car on our long drive home, we talked to her at length about what was happening with Lucy. It didn’t sound good. She sent us a video and Lucy looked awful, unable to lie down and panting rapidly. She wasn’t eating, she wouldn’t take medicine.
We all agreed it was time. We wouldn’t get back to town before Lucy was put to sleep, but I felt strongly that this wasn’t about us getting a last chance to see her, this was about making the right choice for the Lucy.
That was the plan: a three-thirty appointment with the veterinarian and a decision to be made while we drove home. And—and this is the most important thing—a mother-in-law who was willing to do anything and everything for Lucy, including making the difficult decision to put her to sleep and holding her while she died.
About an hour later we got a call. Lucy was in distress—bad distress. We said to go now to any local vet in their town because this was the end and there was nothing more we could do other than end her suffering painlessly. As we were talking, Lucy must have had a heart attack or a seizure or both because she died while we were on the phone.
Her suffering wasn’t long, which is a goodness. We had discussed taking her to be put to sleep before we left for vacation, but she seemed fine then and could have possibly lived for several more months happily. Should we have made the decision sooner? I don’t think so. I think my mother-in-law did everything she could and made the best decisions on how to take care of Lucy. We are very grateful Lucy had someone so loving and caring to be with her through the end.
We’ll miss her very much. We’ve told the children Lucy may not make it and she might die before we get home. They both got very upset and didn’t want her to die. They each death with the news in their own way. Now that Lucy has died, we’re waiting to tell them until we get closer to home. It’s going to be sad, but Nana has suggested we cremate Lucy and have the children bury the remains in the back yard. They both liked the idea, even if they hated the thought of Lucy not being with us anymore.
The Big Boy Update: My son does not want Lucy to die. He dealt with the news with problem solving suggestions. He knows her heart is not well. He suggested cutting a hole in my stomach to remove my heart and then do the same in Lucy, swapping the hearts so Lucy could have a heart that works. After hearing that wasn’t a workable solution he suggested cutting out Lucy’s heart and burying it in the back yard so we can grow another Lucy. He was quite sad.
The Tiny Girl Chronicles: My daughter, upon hearing Lucy might not live through the day, broke into a wailing cry that went on and on for some time. She was upset, saying she didn’t want Lucy to not come back. Then, interleaved with all the crying, she would say, “when are we going to get another dog?” She is going to be very upset to hear Lucy has died.
Poor buttercup. I will miss her.
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