Neurotypical

My daughter had a troublesome day.   Strike that, I’m not sure it was that troublesome to her, but it was to us, her parents.    I got a phone call from the school transportation van driver saying she was going to have to write my daughter up for her behavior.

We don’t know the driver, Naba, that well, but we do know she cares for the children and does what she can to make the ride enjoyable. even though it’s long.   But today wasn’t good.    There is a very young child in the car some of the time and the “baby cries all the time” my daughter has said.   That has to be annoying.    But this was something more.

When Naba arrived we made my daughter stand at the curb with us and listen to what had happened.   She had called the driver stupid, kicked the back of the driver’s seat repeatedly, screamed loudly and then (and this is the best part) told the boys in the back seat that tomorrow she was going to bring a knife in her backpack and cut them up.  

It gets worse though, the children she was threatening were autistic.   They can’t handle the screaming and they were very scared my daughter would follow through with her threat and begged to be brought home first in the future.

As you can well imagine, this won’t do on several fronts.    Naba is very kind and said she didn’t want to write her up and ultimately didn’t (we didn’t try and dissuade her, this was write-up material if there ever was any).   She said in November she was out for some time with hand surgery and the other drivers would write her up easily and if she was written up three times she would lose transportation for the remainder of the year.

My daughter had to stay in her room and there was crying—a lot of crying.   She knew she was in trouble.   The word, “stupid” has been disallowed from the family from here on out unless you’re saying you can’t say the word, “stupid”.

I called our play therapist citing a, “minor behavioral emergency” if she was able.   And she was and in five minutes she had helped me.   Here’s what’s happening:  my daughter is very, very frustrated.   She is neurologically normal or, “neurotypical”.   She’s tired at the end of the day and she’s put in a car with “neuroatypical” or autism spectrum children.   Those children can’t interact with her in a way that’s mentally stimulating we got from Naba and the therapist.  

So bottom line, my daughter is acting out because she’s frustrated and bored.    We have a snack and activity plan for the next two days in the car and then she’s tracked out for three weeks.   If we can’t find a solution to the lack of mental stimulation we may have to pick her up from school for a while.

The Big Boy Update:  My son is getting the reading thing down faster than I would have expected.   There were issues with his class last year that caused his education to get multiple staggered starts putting him a bit behind.   He seems to be catching up quickly now.

The Tiny Girl Chronicles:  At bedtime my daughter said, “I don’t like you yelling at me”.   I told her I was sorry and I hated yelling at her.   I asked her to come up with some ideas for the ride home to keep her entertained and she came up with coloring in a coloring book “with big lines”.   She picked three marker colors.   We’ll see if that helps tomorrow and she doesn’t threaten to knife anyone again.