Other People Can See

I’m suffering from an over-awareness problem.   This can happen to you when you have to be aware of something that historically, you never paid attention to, didn’t need to know, never cared about.   For example, my good friend has a daughter who was diagnosed with Type I diabetes some years ago.   I don’t know anything about blood sugar fluctuations, the amount of carbs in particular foods and all the hazards her daughter may face on a daily basis.   My friend does all these things without thinking, because she has to.

With my daughter’s reduced vision, I’ve become aware of the ground in a way I never would have expected to.   When my daughter’s walking with us she usually can tell when there is a change in elevation such as a curb or step, but not always.   Natural settings and low-contrast surfaces are more difficult for her to discern.   Without ever complaining, she moves across her world with very little difficulty.   The only worry is the times when she doesn’t see something that would cause her to fall or run into something which could injure her.   It’s those times that have caused me to be hyper aware of my environment.

When I’m with my daughter this is good: I watch for situations she might not see well and casually give her some advice just in time so she can be successful.   In some cases I just steer her away from dangerous obstacles and at other times I instruct her to stop or be careful as she approaches something like the edge of the lake with a drop-off at the edge hidden in the grass.

What also happens is through extrapolation, I watch out for every child around me.   I know my son and our other children friends can fine.  I am aware they are just as capable of seeing the environment around them so they can safely move through it, and yet I have a hard time not telling them, “there’s a step to your left”.

It’s nice to have this protective ability as a parent.   But in some ways I hate it.   I wish I’d never needed to have this extra awareness.    But wallowing in my disappointment doesn’t help; accepting what is and what can and can’t be is the only way to move forward—so I’m moving forward.  Did I mention my daughter was not only happy but cute as well?

The Big Boy Update:  My son is a rock collector.   He has been finding rocks from all around my parent’s yard, the gravel path, the parking lot and the rock garden at the restaurant.   He is dismayed when we explain he can’t take the large or many or dirty rocks into the car and home with him.   His collecting this weekend has been an extension of his collecting with his friends at home.   They’ve been digging up rocks on the clay hill for several days.   The location for their “collection” has been our front porch.   Again, my son was both disappointed and dismayed he couldn’t bring in his rock collection to take to bed.

The Tiny Girl Chronicles:  My daughter’s tactile skills are compensating for her lack of vision.   There was a toy cash register at my parent’s house this weekend which contained a large array of plastic coins.   Intermixed with these coins were a few real coins.   My daughter realized some of the coins were real and went through every single coin, separating them out.    She netted over a dollar when she was done.