Ballroom Dancing

When I was a youth (which was some time ago by my reckoning) I was put into Junior Cotillion classes by my parents.   I wasn’t keen on the whole thing at first because I was of that age where boys were in the unnamed land between gross and desirable, but there was no getting out of it.   We would meet once each week and be given a lesson in manners by the elegant lady who was our instructor.    She taught me many things that didn’t seem important then, but I remembered.   Those words of wisdom have served me well over the years.

We sat in chairs around the perimeter of a large room and after the talking part was over, she would teach us a ballroom dancing step with one of the boys or girls to help her demonstrate.   Then, she would tell the boys to get up, walk across the room and ask one of us to dance.  We, as ladies, were not allowed to refuse or act upset by the invitation in any way—because this was what polite ladies did.

We would then try mightily to repeat the step she’d taught us, stepping on each other’s feet and stumbling through the beat.   We’d switch partners and practice some more.   By the end of the night we had it down and had added it in to the steps we’d learned in prior classes.   It didn’t seem fun at the time, but I grew to like it and later took some ballroom dancing lessons as an adult.  

There is a subtle communication that happens between the two partners, with the man leading.   The phrase, “where the man goes, the lady must follow” comes to mind.   It became easy after a while, with me not even thinking about what I was doing, just following along to the lead of my partner.

I’m still doing that ballroom dancing now, only it’s not with a man, it’s with my daughter.   She’s the lady, and she has no choice but to follow the lead of the person directing her either by hand, voice or gentle pressure on her shoulder.    She’s getting fairly good at letting someone else direct her when she doesn’t know the location or situation.  

It’s not a skill I would wish for a child to have to learn so young, but she’s a child and is resilient and doesn’t seem to mind letting someone else take the lead to keep her safe and protect her from bumping into things and hurting herself.

The Big Boy Update:  We were going to our favorite sushi restaurant tonight.   My son, upon hearing we were going there said, “Sushi Thai is my favorite.   Dunkin Donuts is my least favorite, because it makes me fat.”

The Tiny Girl Chronicles:  My daughter loves the salad with ginger dressing at sushi restaurants.   Tonight when I thought she was done and was about to move her bowl away she stopped me and said, “no mom, I want to drink the juice”.   I told her I liked to drink the extra ginger dressing at the bottom of the bowl too.