Meeting a Friend

This isn’t about catching up with a friend, it’s about meeting a friend for the first time.  I think I told a story about a year ago in which one of our friends in the neighborhood heard about my daughter’s sudden vision loss.   He got in contact with me and told me we had another neighbor who was a retina surgeon.   He said he’d let her know about me and was it okay if she got in touch with me.

Last Labor Day at around dinner time she called me.   She took time out on a holiday to talk to me about what was happening in my daughter’s eyes.  I took notes—furious notes—because I didn’t know the medical terms in lots of cases and I wanted to make sure to get down all her suggestions and advice.   She talked to me like a friend, not like a doctor who was telling me matter of factly the situation.   She understood how scared I was and how lost we felt as parents, not knowing what was happening with our child.

We were on the phone for quite some time and at the end she told me she was there if I needed anything.    In the past year I’ve contacted her several times, once I remember in complete panic, when we were scared things were suddenly getting worse.    Each time she gave me the advice I needed and the support of a fellow mother.    She was such a comfort.

Here is the thing though—we’ve never met.   We keep meaning on meeting and almost met once I think at a neighborhood function, but we missed each other.   Last nigh however, we finally met.   I was out on the street, handing out my inoculations (adult beverages) and she stopped me and said, “I’m Lisa”.   I think I may have hugged her a bit too hard, but I was so very glad to see her.

We caught up quickly on the latest with my daughter’s eyes.   We had to catch up quickly, what with the chaos of Halloween surrounding us and her children heading down the street without her.   Folks I have to tell you, had there been a pop quiz on eye terms related to my daughter’s condition we discussed, I think I would have gotten a ninety-five percent.   I’ve learned a lot over the past year.  As we got to the cul-de-sac I met one of Lisa’s children, her daughter who also four-years-old.   She knows all sorts of things about eyes because she’s interested in her mother’s work.  I suspect she might know more about eyes than I do.

I gave Lisa another hug and we made plans to get together for coffee or a play date or something sometime soon.    As she left I had a big smile on my face.   It’s so nice to meet a friend you’ve been wanting to meet for a long time.

The Big Boy Update:  My son got a card game in a happy meal today.   You lay out the cards and select two that have something in common, naming what that commonality is.   I picked the bamboo and tree cards and said, “these two are plants”.   My son said, “can I pick the lion and the tiger cards?”  I told him sure, what did those two have in common?   What he said was not what I had expected.   He told me, “the lion and the tiger are both predators.”

The Tiny Girl Chronicles:  My daughter was helping me make lunches for tomorrow.  She decided quesadillas would be nice so I got out the cheese slices and asked her to cover up one tortilla and then we’d put the second one on top and microwave it to melt the cheese.   She’s done this before and solves the cheese coverage problem in her own way.  Instead of using as few, large pieces as possible, she prefers many, many smaller pieces.  She tears up the cheese slice square into small bits.   She was in the midst of this today when she said, “mommy, do  you know this thing is a trapezoid?”  I looked over and yes, she was holding a regular trapezoidal-shaped piece of cheese.

Final Taper:  We ran five miles today as our last, pre NYC Marathon, run.   Less than a week away now.   I’m looking forward to the weekend.